Dark side made me do it

Dark side made me do it

Sunday, March 4, 2012

The Decision

February was one of the roughness months on my weight loss journey. My Stress level was very high as many area’s in my life were showing signs that a change was needed. I like things very routine, I thrive on the basics in my life stay the same day in day out. So when I can see changes are on the horizon, I began to get stressed out.

February started out strong, that first week I was doing my cardio 2110 Fitness three days a week, 2 hours each day. My sessions With Damir were amazing; he pushed far beyond my limits with most sessions. I enjoyed my reward for reaching my weight loss goal in January; I did Damir’s Saturday morning kickboxing class. The kickboxing class was awesome, I got to partner with Sandra it was such a great hour. We laughed, and sweated our butts off! It was awesome.
Things quickly changed, First my cat Chibi stop eating. So Kristy and I had to force feed him Several times a day. So this meant on my cardio days, I needed to come home and feed him then do my cardio in my basement on my own hamster wheel. At first this was hard after feeding Chibi; I needed to get by my comfy lazy boy chair to go to the basement. After a few days I found my routine and made it past, and found my stride. As the month continued more home repairs surfaced and I had to make a tough decision. I had to stop Partner Training with Damir. This was a very hard decision to make, after several days of struggling with it I talked to Damir about it and we made a plan together what I would do when we stopped training. Two days later my kitchen sink started to leak and that was it I had to make the decision to stop and go forward with the plan. So our last session would be on February 28th.
The day of our last session came quick. Just before Ryan arrived for our session Damir asked how I was doing, and I smiled and said “I am good”. But he could see right through me. He replied “No I think you’re sad, and scared about what is going to happen after today. The new Boot camp will be like having one of your sessions with 20 other people!” Our last session was all the great exercises from the past. Hammer slams, tire flips with burpees, Alternating Cleans, 15 incline on the Treadmill, and Damir even threw in my favourite from when we were at Alive, Pushing him up the hallway, or maybe I should say fighting him up the hallway. At 2110 Fitness we did from one end of the gym to the other. It was one of the best sessions I have ever had.
March 1st was my first day at Damir’s new Boot Camp. There were lots of Familiar faces, Sandra, Lara, and Kat Jacob, Jamie and Jen and lots of new ones. It was nice to catch up with Kat Jacob before class. When Damir said the boot camp would be like one of my sessions with 20 other people he was not kidding. It was just as intense, no maybe more intense then one of our session. It did not feel like there was a lot of time resting at all it was just go, go and go. It was awesome!!

The biggest thing I will miss about Partner training is my partner. My Best friend Ryan and I have been Training together for a very long time. It was always very motivating to workout with Ryan. He would push and push me, call me out when I was slacking and celebrate with me when we did something an amazing, which was almost every week. I will miss that.
I did not reach all my goals I set in January. I lost 7 pounds, not the 12 I was hoping for, I did reach more than my goal of 70 km, and I did 81 km on the hamster wheel. 68 of them on the hamster wheel in my basement. I also did 60 km on the Airdyne before my cat got sick, I would have surpassed my goal. The biggest thing I learned in February is that I can do cardio away from the gym in my own basement, which is where I will do most of it in the future.

Looking over some old photo and I have added a few from Day 2 of my Journey taken on June 4th 2009 and one from last summer as that is the latest photo I have of my whole body. I think I see a difference. I will never go back to that weight ever.

March Goals
· Lose 10 pounds
· 80 km on the hamster wheel

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Back in Action

I had 3 goals for the past month, lose 10 pounds, get the food under control and run/jog 60km. Also in January I wanted to work on finding balance in my life between working out, family and friends. January went by so quickly.
January had some pretty amazing workout. I spent more than a few hours on the hamster wheel; today I am sitting at 45km in January. Not at my goal but after tomorrow I will be at 50km and that is a good start to the year. To try and work on balance in my life I tried to using the treadmill at home a few times, but have decided that it is best to workout out at the gym as I don’t push as hard at home. Sandra and I also worked out together at 2110 fitness this month. It was awesome to pound out the hamster wheel work with a friend. It was motivating as she would go hard so I would do the same. After the hamster wheel we did a hardcore workout, it was awesome.
My sessions with Damir were kickass as always. Almost every session we have spent time on the hamster wheel. The hamster wheel with Damir is hard with a purpose. The best one this month has been the exercise I call the double hamster wheel to hell. Damir has me power walk at a 15 incline for 5mins and Ryan jogging on the treadmill beside me, every time I hop off the treadmill to rest or hang on to the treadmill he increases Ryan’s incline, if Ryan hops off the treadmill he increases my speed. It is brutal.
I have had some success with my weight this month. As of last Monday I am down 11 pounds so far in January. It seems the more I stick to my food plan the better I feel and the weight comes off faster. I found out this month that I like avocado and almond milk. I really love the avocado in my salads. Not sure about have almond milk in my oatmeal; I think I prefer water but I am getting used to it. I officially step on the scale tomorrow for my last weigh in for January. But as of yesterday I am only down 1 pound. I am sure it would have been more this week, however I had a very bad cold this week so I did not do much cardio outside my sessions this week.
As I look back at the month of January I must decide if I have reached my goals and if I should reward myself. I did lose more than 10 pounds so that is a good thing. I am thinking I could have lost more with a little more focus. I did not reach my goal of 60 km on the hamster wheel. I did spend time with family and friends this month, I reached that goal there. The old Brian would ask everyone what they think and not make my own self evaluation. However I can do this on my own. I did lose more than the 10 pounds I was shooting for, so , so since I am not a dog, I will reward myself with one of Damir classes in February if there is room not Food. I was 10 km short on the hamster wheel goal. The consequence to that is I am adding 10 extra to the month of February.

February’s goals
· Lose 12 pounds or more
· 60km on the hamster wheel
· 10km extra on the hamsterwheel
· 100 km on the Airdyne

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Hey, Hey, My, My

Well I took a little break from posting my blog as it has been a tough 3 months. As I struggled I felt it was best not to share my struggle as I did not want to let anyone down. Many friends and family have pointed out to me that struggling is a part of my journey and posting will help me with the struggle. To be honest I have lost and regained the same 10 to 15 pounds in the last three months. I am referring the last 3 months as the dark time. In my darkest time I was sitting in McDonalds staring at the menu board for quite a long, debating to have a Big Mac or not. I did not have one that day, but have caved last week and had one. It was not worth it.

In order to regain control of my weight loss journey I need to find balance in my life. My lifestyle will always have fitness in it now. But I need to find the balance between my fitness lifestyle, my family, friends and work. In 2011 I did not see my niece enough. Every time I did get to see her, she looked so much taller. In 2012 I need to make time to see her. I also have not seen my friend Pam in months, my friends Chad and Michelle had a baby and they brought her into Wal-Mart to meet me. These are all signs I need to take time out and spend some time with family and friends. So even if I work hard all week and I am very tried I need take some time on my weekends off to see family and friends.

The good news is that I have a good plan to regain control of my food. Also I am make big strides learning to run, and made some great fitness goals for 2012. My biggest goal is to eat clean for 100 days, doing this will bring good food habits in my life. Second goal is to run a 10k in May and get my time under 2 hours. In the summer I would like to play football. These will take allot of training and running so cardio is very important. So my ass will be on the treadmill 3 to 4 times a week. 2110 Fitness has also changed the gym layout; with the new layout it is very easy to do suicides up and down the turf. I plan to do this 2 times a week; this will also help me get used to running on the ground not on a treadmill.

Hey, Hey, My, My I have come a very long way, but I still have a quite a way to go. It is easy to forget how bad I was in the beginning. Damir, Kim, Kristy, and Holly have helped me come so far. There was a time I could not tie my own shoe laces, walk up a flight of stairs without becoming winded, fit into a booth at a restaurant, get up off the ground if I fell, do burpees, do a 5k; well I could go on forever here. Since it has been a while where these things were issues in my life I have forgot and lost my focus. But I don’t want to go back to not have a life again so I am taking time to refocus and get my mojo back.

Reaching goals this year is very important to me this year, I lost my way with that in 2011, this year goals will have deadlines. I think if I give myself reasonable deadlines I will have better success. Also I stop rewarding myself when I reached goals. So in 2012 I will be rewarding myself when I reach small and big goals. My first small goal is to drop 10 pounds and to run 60 km before the end of January. My rewards will be non food rewards. When I reach my first goal my reward will be to drop in to one of Damir’s Bootcamp or Kickboxing classes in February.

Also I won’t go so long without post a new blog entry again, so look forward to new entry weather I am rocking it or weather I am struggling.