Watch me do what some people think can't be done !

Back in Action

2012-01-29T10:07:00.000-08:00

I had 3 goals for the past month, lose 10 pounds, get the food under control and run/jog 60km. Also in January I wanted to work on finding balance in my life between working out, family and friends. January went by so quickly.
January had some pretty amazing workout. I spent more than a few hours on the hamster wheel; today I am sitting at 45km in January. Not at my goal but after tomorrow I will be at 50km and that is a good start to the year. To try and work on balance in my life I tried to using the treadmill at home a few times, but have decided that it is best to workout out at the gym as I don’t push as hard at home. Sandra and I also worked out together at 2110 fitness this month. It was awesome to pound out the hamster wheel work with a friend. It was motivating as she would go hard so I would do the same. After the hamster wheel we did a hardcore workout, it was awesome.
My sessions with Damir were kickass as always. Almost every session we have spent time on the hamster wheel. The hamster wheel with Damir is hard with a purpose. The best one this month has been the exercise I call the double hamster wheel to hell. Damir has me power walk at a 15 incline for 5mins and Ryan jogging on the treadmill beside me, every time I hop off the treadmill to rest or hang on to the treadmill he increases Ryan’s incline, if Ryan hops off the treadmill he increases my speed. It is brutal.
I have had some success with my weight this month. As of last Monday I am down 11 pounds so far in January. It seems the more I stick to my food plan the better I feel and the weight comes off faster. I found out this month that I like avocado and almond milk. I really love the avocado in my salads. Not sure about have almond milk in my oatmeal; I think I prefer water but I am getting used to it. I officially step on the scale tomorrow for my last weigh in for January. But as of yesterday I am only down 1 pound. I am sure it would have been more this week, however I had a very bad cold this week so I did not do much cardio outside my sessions this week.
As I look back at the month of January I must decide if I have reached my goals and if I should reward myself. I did lose more than 10 pounds so that is a good thing. I am thinking I could have lost more with a little more focus. I did not reach my goal of 60 km on the hamster wheel. I did spend time with family and friends this month, I reached that goal there. The old Brian would ask everyone what they think and not make my own self evaluation. However I can do this on my own. I did lose more than the 10 pounds I was shooting for, so , so since I am not a dog, I will reward myself with one of Damir classes in February if there is room not Food. I was 10 km short on the hamster wheel goal. The consequence to that is I am adding 10 extra to the month of February.

February’s goals
· Lose 12 pounds or more
· 60km on the hamster wheel
· 10km extra on the hamsterwheel
· 100 km on the Airdyne

Hey, Hey, My, My

2012-01-04T17:02:00.001-08:00

Well I took a little break from posting my blog as it has been a tough 3 months. As I struggled I felt it was best not to share my struggle as I did not want to let anyone down. Many friends and family have pointed out to me that struggling is a part of my journey and posting will help me with the struggle. To be honest I have lost and regained the same 10 to 15 pounds in the last three months. I am referring the last 3 months as the dark time. In my darkest time I was sitting in McDonalds staring at the menu board for quite a long, debating to have a Big Mac or not. I did not have one that day, but have caved last week and had one. It was not worth it.

In order to regain control of my weight loss journey I need to find balance in my life. My lifestyle will always have fitness in it now. But I need to find the balance between my fitness lifestyle, my family, friends and work. In 2011 I did not see my niece enough. Every time I did get to see her, she looked so much taller. In 2012 I need to make time to see her. I also have not seen my friend Pam in months, my friends Chad and Michelle had a baby and they brought her into Wal-Mart to meet me. These are all signs I need to take time out and spend some time with family and friends. So even if I work hard all week and I am very tried I need take some time on my weekends off to see family and friends.

The good news is that I have a good plan to regain control of my food. Also I am make big strides learning to run, and made some great fitness goals for 2012. My biggest goal is to eat clean for 100 days, doing this will bring good food habits in my life. Second goal is to run a 10k in May and get my time under 2 hours. In the summer I would like to play football. These will take allot of training and running so cardio is very important. So my ass will be on the treadmill 3 to 4 times a week. 2110 Fitness has also changed the gym layout; with the new layout it is very easy to do suicides up and down the turf. I plan to do this 2 times a week; this will also help me get used to running on the ground not on a treadmill.

Hey, Hey, My, My I have come a very long way, but I still have a quite a way to go. It is easy to forget how bad I was in the beginning. Damir, Kim, Kristy, and Holly have helped me come so far. There was a time I could not tie my own shoe laces, walk up a flight of stairs without becoming winded, fit into a booth at a restaurant, get up off the ground if I fell, do burpees, do a 5k; well I could go on forever here. Since it has been a while where these things were issues in my life I have forgot and lost my focus. But I don’t want to go back to not have a life again so I am taking time to refocus and get my mojo back.

Reaching goals this year is very important to me this year, I lost my way with that in 2011, this year goals will have deadlines. I think if I give myself reasonable deadlines I will have better success. Also I stop rewarding myself when I reached goals. So in 2012 I will be rewarding myself when I reach small and big goals. My first small goal is to drop 10 pounds and to run 60 km before the end of January. My rewards will be non food rewards. When I reach my first goal my reward will be to drop in to one of Damir’s Bootcamp or Kickboxing classes in February.

Also I won’t go so long without post a new blog entry again, so look forward to new entry weather I am rocking it or weather I am struggling.

Not only did I meet my goal I destroyed it.

2011-09-21T11:20:00.000-07:00

The last 2 weeks have been amazing, my workouts have been extreme, and I hit some great strides. In my last blog post I talked about the toughest workout I have ever done. Well the following Tuesday Damir tweaked it and made it much harder.

It started with Damir explaining that there would be two stopwatches, one will time the workout, and with the other, he would be timing the amount of time that I was taking a break or switching from the Airdyne bike to the hamster wheel. The workout was 1min on the Airdyne and then 2mins on the hamster wheel and so on... until I reach 10mins on the hamster wheel. As I started out I was on the Airdyne I was thinking this is going to be hard, really hard! At the 6min mark I was not sure I would be able to finish this workout. I must have jumped off that treadmill 10 times in that 6min run. That is when Damir started raise his voice a little, letting me know that if the break stopwatch reaches 10mins the workout is done. At the 8min run on the treadmill I was freaking out, it was crazy hard, but dug deep and finished the 8mins. Now Damir could see I was not doing well mentally and while I was on the Airdyne he sat on the bike beside me and calmed me down. Now the 10min run was the hardest thing I ever did. The speed of the hamster wheel was high, and as I ran I just started to panic, and I jumped off time and time again. Now Damir is yelling, because I was over 8mins on the rest stopwatch, every time I hopped off he got louder and louder. The last 2mins of that 10min run I had Meghan on the treadmill beside me cheering me on, and I was crying it was so hard, it was so bad. I did finish with 9:15 of rest. I was so pissed, so I asked immediately asked if I could do it again 10 days later, on next Thursday.

I decided that was not good enough, I wanted better under 8mins of rest is what I was thinking would be good. So at boot camp I tried to push hard, and these were hard boot camps. The great thing about Boot camp is that everyone in the class is very supportive and certain people will call me out if I am slacking. The first boot camp workout after that hard workout we had to pick partners, so I picked Shaimaa, she pushed me good. During the several circuits in the few weeks I tired to be close to people who would call me out and push me, like Meghan, Sandra, Jacob or Paula. Boot camp was good and I gave it my all.

So the redo day of that workout came, this time I was so focused. Damir said “are we still shooting for under 8mins of rest?” I said let’s just get it under 9. This time I controlled my breathing, taking each time on the treadmill 2mins at a time. When I was on the Airdyne I really focused on my breathing, before I knew it, I was doing the 8min run and this time Damir did not raise his voice once. In fact he kept saying... “Oh we are going to have changed this for next time; it is too easy for you!” I kept focused and finished the 8min run. During the ten min run I only stopped 3 times. I finished under 7mins of rest. Not only did I meet my goal I destroyed it.

This week started off with a bang, Tuesday’s session was awesome we got to play with the Big Ass tire and I am very much improving on that.

Fear starts to set in

2011-09-02T21:17:00.000-07:00

This week started with a bang. Monday, Damir was still away from boot camp so Kate was the Sub instructor again. It was another awesome class, the warm up was very intense, the spin bike and push ups one hand on a step one hand on the ground. It was hard we did that for about 10 to 15 minutes. The rest of the class was the same way very intense. Kate made me realize I can do more cardio then I think I can and I enjoy the way her class flowed. It was great she is definitely as crazy as Damir.

Tuesday session with Damir was awesome. I warmed up on the hamster wheel just walking as my legs were very sore from boot camp. At the beginning of Ryan and I session Damir Said “ let’s put u on the Airdyne bike before Ryan comes out of the change room” now I was very apprehensive about getting on as the last time we did that it did not go well. I got on and it went well, very well so we started on the bike. I started with 3 minutes on the bike, after that it was pushing and pulling a weight sled and Giant tire flips. The whole time Damir worked on fixing my form with flipping the tire. We made 2 adjustments and it felt a little easier to flip the tire. That was the first half of our session; it was tough but not super insane. That came in the second half session. The second half consisted of burpees, rowing in the weight sled (which felt extremely heavy), bear crawls and push ups. It was repeated 5 times, it was intense and went on for a very long time and there was no stopping to catch my breath. In fact all I heard was Damir “come on Brian.....Lets goo Brian ..... pick it up Brian ......good job not stopping Brian... chest First Brian....lets Go” like I said it went on for a very long time!!

Wednesday I took a rest Day

Thursday was Crazy I arrived at 2110 Fitness Damir was Training Kim, as I walked By, Damir Said “Remember last month when I said I can’t wait to put you through the workout that Kim was doing? YEAH we are doing that today!” now I did remember, it looked like Damir was trying to kill Kim with the hamster wheel and Airdyne. In fact I had never seen Kim work so hard ever, and she is an animal when it comes to working out. So I got changed, ate my snack, and hopped on the hamster wheel to warm up. I was walking for about 5 minutes when all of sudden Damir was turning off my hamster wheel and he said “Get off I want you to lift weights to warm up!” now he has NEVER taken me off the hamster wheel before a workout before so fear starts to set in. I fire a text off to Ryan letting him know he just pulled me off the hamster wheel, why should I be the only on freaking out. As I am doing the weights Damir suggested I am sure I look terrified..... Because well I remember that the two times I seen Kim do that workout she was doing it non stop! Off the Airdyne on the hamster wheel not stopping to catch her breath she just powered through the whole hour like a machine. I think she had 1minutie of rest the whole time. The half hour of lifting weights blow by very fast. Ryan arrived and I ask if he got my text he responded in his sarcastic tone “thanks for that”

I hop on the Airdyne and I start; it was 1min going as hard as I could, then off to the hamster wheel at a 15 incline. While I am on the hamster wheel Damir says “hope you boys are ready! Because this session will not be easy like all our other sessions” I am thinking are you fucking kidding me I am still feeling Tuesday’s workout and Tuesday was not easy! The first 2mins were intense. Then on the Airdyne again this time 2mins. now my heart is just pounding. Then it’s off to the hamster Wheel for 2mins now I am feeling overwhelmed, I remember something from the Zen Book I am reading and I just breathe and focus and the overwhelming feeling leaves. At the 5 min on the Airdyne mark I ask for the bucket in the corner just in case, but it turns out I did not need it at all. After the 6 min on the Airdyne Damir says that we were done. Ryan and I made it to 6mins I have to say we gave everything we had to it; Kim made it to 10min on each in her hour’s session. That is just crazy, she is a workout machine. She makes me want to work even harder on my cardio to be able to make it to 10mins on both as well. That Session went by so fast, I had all the signs of a great workout, light headedness, dizziness, I had to vomit and my shirt was soaked wet. I have done an hour on the treadmill with Damir many times before, which was hard; this was 10 times harder it rocked!! After that session I have named the Airdyne, Emma, because it is awesome, and I think I may have found my new love, it is much more fun than Sara (the curved hamster wheel). Best Session Ever!!

Friday’s boot camp was an awesome circuit, 13 crazy exercises. Started with burpees, that is my favourite station to start with as I don’t want to end the hour with them. It was a very sweaty hour, I felt bad for Kat Jacob as I think she shared a sweat spot with me through the whole class. She was very motivating we had lots of hi five and I think we both cursed at the same exercises. It was a great class I liked it a lot.

This week was so intensely awesome makes me excited to see what happens next week!

“Climbing the Web”

2011-08-28T02:01:00.000-07:00

This week has been a week of pushing out of my comfort zone, learning more about me, and regaining my confidence back. It has been a good week controlling my diet, working my body and pushing past what I thought was my limits.

My week started with a good meeting with Kim to review my food log and talk about the next phase in my food plan. After my meeting with Kim, I went back to Sandra and Lara’s and Sandra cut my hair. This was the first step in regaining my confidence. She did and awesome job and after my haircut I started to feel good again. After that we went swimming, I have never felt comfortable being in public with my shirt off. But on Sunday I did and I felt ok with it. In fact I was very comfortable that I even forgot that I don’t like getting in to the deep water diving tank because the last time I did I need two people to help me get out of the tank. So it hit me about 20 minutes after I was in the tank how am I going to get out. Sandra said “you will be fine pulling yourself out of the pool” and she was right it was easy. It was a fun day.

Monday boot camp was brutal, Damir had us doing Tabata, in a circuit. It was hard. I started with bicep curls, my arms were so sore after that station. As I did each station on the circuit, I gave it my all. By the time I was done my arms felt like Jelly.

Tuesday I arrived at 2110 Fitness early and jump on a Hamster wheel. As I was warming up on the Hamster wheel, I remembered that in my meeting with Kim on Sunday I said to her that I wonder if I could run on the Hamster wheel at a 5. After about 20mins of power walking I decided that I am going to give it a shot. So When Kim arrived and jumped on the Hamster wheel beside me I ask her “if I run at 5 for 1 minute that would count as being able to run at 5.” She agreed. So I turned it up slowly. I got to 4.7, got scared and ran the minute at 4.7. Then I turned it down and walk for a 2 minutes. Then I tried again. This time I got it to 5 and I ran for the minute, but kept going to 1 minute and 15 seconds then I hopped off. I turned to Kim and said “I have not been pushing myself hard enough!” She smiled and said “Clearly!!”

So going into my session With Damir I was Excited to share my news, Ryan was running a few minutes late, so Damir and I started without him. Going with the theme of my triumph on the hamster wheel, we started with Dirty Burpees. As I started Damir Said “No stopping! You will do 10 in a row, hopping on all of them!” It was tough but I pushed and did it. Every Set in that session he push me to go beyond and push past my limit or what I thought was my limit. It was an awesome session!!

Wednesday’s Boot camp was a high Cardio! It was so intense. We start at 6:30 on the Spin Bike, after the spin bike he threw everything at us. Push up, burpees; step up, rockstars ... it went on and on and on. We did not stop to break until 7:00pm. It was crazy!! Then we started all over again. Just like in my session on Tuesday he did not let up, he called me out almost every time I tried to stop and catch my breath. I felt bad for my boot camp Buddy Kat Jacob, we were workout almost on top of one another and it was such a hard class I was swearing, and farting all through. But we rocked it!! I really love that Boot camp class I hope we do it again real soon!!

Thursday I did Cardio.

Friday was a very awesome day I reached a goal I have had for a very long time. When I was at alive, Mondays I did 2 hours of cardio on the hamster wheel, while I did that there was always a class going on in the studio right beside the hamster wheel. Kate’s class, it always looked extremely hard. I thought wow she is crazy like Damir; I totally want to try that class when I am in better shape. She was the Sub instructor of Damir’s Boot Camp on Friday. It was as crazy as I thought I would be. I knew we were in trouble after our warm up when the first Exercise was 2 minutes of burpees. It was awesome! Later she took 2 exercises that I find very difficult and put them together. 1 I just became able to do, spider planks, and the other was mountain Climbers. It was brutal, but proud to say it did every set of them. It was so good I feel it needs a great name so I am calling that exercise “Climbing the Web”! It was an awesome Class!

All around it was an awesome week. I got my confidence back, push myself on the hamster wheel way out of my comfort zone and met some awesome goals! Wow it was a great Week!

extremely intense

2011-08-14T15:44:00.000-07:00

This has been a hard month; my confidence has not been there. I have had a lot of head issues; I have been on this journey a long time, in my head I am not where I want to be weight wise and fitness wise. It maybe from the fact that I still see myself as being too fat to do things I want to do. Which that is mostly just in my head. An example of that was in Thursday’s session I asked Damir if I Did something wrong in the last set as I felt it went faster for me then when Ryan did it, so I must have made an error. He turned the next set into a race. Ryan went very fast on this round, finished it in 3mins 25 seconds. I thought ok well I am not going to beat that time, no way. Damir Said “get that out of your head, you just need to do the rockstar pushups better and you can beat his time.” As I started Damir was down on the green fake grass matting with me, as I did them he said “get it out of your head you need to stop and catch your breath at the bottom of the push up! You don’t!!” I finished the Rockstar pushups with lots of time to finish the Alternate cleans with the Kettle bells to beat the time. Which I did I finished at 3min 15 seconds.

Since the beginning of my journey I have heard Kim Talk about how she loves the kettle bells, how awesome swinging them is. Ryan has also said how awesome it is. Now I have always wanted to swing them, but because of my apron that just was not possible to do it right. A few week ago Damir and I tried to do them again and I could now physically do them, just had to work on my form. So after doing them at 2110 and in boot camp and still not feeling like I was getting it, I review the videos that I made of boot camp. I study how smooth it is suppose to look and I am happy to say on Thursday I was able to do 20 in a row correctly without stopping and it felt pretty smooth.

I have always have had great training sessions with Damir, they have changed into extremely intense hours. Since Damir has settled into 2110 Fitness he keeps raising the bar. I used to say Thursdays workouts were my last chance workout, like on the biggest loser. Thursday’s were always crazy. Now the equipment at 2110 is so awesome, Damir is like a kid in a Candy store, I sweat my ass off right from the start. Now every session seems to be like the old Thursdays workout but more and more intense. When I am on the bus headed to 2110 I start to get very excited, not knowing what he is going to have us do. Will there be The Big ass Tire or the weight sled in today’s workout. The place has made our training session extremely intense; it has become my favourite two hours out of the week. I used to start out cold, not warming up before our sessions; I can no longer do that. I get to 2110 and I hop on a treadmill to get my heart going because I am sure we are going to start out with a bang.

Boot camp has also been awesome in last month. Damir has turned into the guy from the DQ commercials. In Boot camp we just don’t do jumping jacks.... we do squatting jumping jacks.........or ......we don’t just do burpees........... We do dirty burpees..... or..... we just don’t do pushups .......We do rock star pushups. So it has been very crazy there as well. There were a few days where the only part of my body that did not hurt was my nose. The best was this week when we ran the “hill of Hell” we didn’t just run up and down the “hill of hell”.... We zigg zagged from the "Hill of Hell” to Macleod trail. It was awesome!!

Food as always has been a struggle in the last month. I have made a few poor choices, a few weeks ago I worked late and the store Manger bought pizza for everyone. I normally pass on the free food at work, as I am on a plan and I try to stick to it. But the smell was amazing so I caved and I had a piece. It tasted so good, so I had a second piece. That was not the right thing to do, now it seems all I wanted to do is cheat and have something bad. This week Kim has given me a new plan and I am doing much better. I really like it. I have also change my lock screen on my Iphone to a photo of a quote on the wall of Damir Studio. It is helping keep me grounded and on track.

I am looking forward to next week!!!

Damir Loves Burpees!

2011-07-14T23:19:00.000-07:00

My week this week has been an amazing week. This week I counted some of the staple exercises I do week in week out. I started to counted from my training session last Thursday to my session today. So let’s start with the Big Ass Tire Flips in my training sessions I flip the tire 31 times, that is over two sessions. Flipping that tire is so empowering. Damir ‘s new thing is to have us flip the tire after doing so much work that my heart is flying out of my chest. No thinking just flip it. Don’t tell Damir but I love that dam tire.

Next 103 Alternate cleans with the Black Kettle bells. Once I was good at this exercise, but lately I cringe when he says it is in the session. In fact last Thursday Damir list off everything we going to-do in our session and I was smiling after he said everything because it was not on the list. But of course Damir used his Jedi mind trick and read my mind and somehow it got dropped into our workout. On Tuesday he added them in near the end of our session and as I did them on our last round he asked me to do it nonstop in the last 20 seconds, but I decided to put them down 3 seconds short of the 20 seconds. Now this pissed him off little and instead of moving on to the next exercise I had to do them again and not put them down until Damir said? It was hard and I bitched a little but I finished it.

183 Burpees, this is an exercise I have done in every class and training session. I have done those in my dreams as I slept this week. Damir Loves Burpees! Doing burpees in boot camp is much harder than in my sessions. In my session I try and do them on the green matting (fake grass) at 2110 fitness. I just throw my body down with no fear. It is awesome!!

Mountain climbers, another one of Damir’s Favourites, i have done these bad boys in every session and boot camp this week expect today’s. The thing I like about the mountain climbers is that they lead to other great bootcamp Exercises like Bear crawls, pushing the smaller weight sled and much more.

Also this week I have done 25 Km of cardio. This started with the 10KM Stampede Road Race on Sunday, this was quite a day. As we were at the start line, I was looking around and I was the biggest person there. There was a line that Matt from Biggest loser season 2 said in last year’s biggest losers follow up show as he got ready to do a big race he noticed he was the biggest person about to attempt to do it. He said “sometimes it is good to see a chubby guy set out to do something he is not supposed to be able to do.” It was a hard task, as I started I controlled my breathing as much as I could and for the first 5 km I jogged as much as I could and walked , the last 5 km I power walked it. It was a long time to spend pushing myself on my own. Pushing through the pain and pushing my body to go faster past my body’s limit. The volunteers clapping and encouraging me to finish was awesome. At about 8 Km’s they merged the 3 races the full and half marathon runners with the 10km runners, when they started to pass me it was very emotional for me as they were patting me on my back and clapping as they passed me. For me it was not about how long it took to finish it was about finishing .........or finishing strong. Giving it all I had which is what I did. Yes I had a time in mind it want to finish by, but I was more focused on just finishing strong. I finished a 10k i am very proud i was able to meet this awesome goal!! It was also awesome to do it with the empowerment Boot camper crew, support from strangers is one thing, but support from my follow boot campers was much more special. Thanks Ladies it meant allot that you were all there when I finished.

I have other great milestones I have reached this week. The 10k was the biggest one, however this week I am now able to-do the dummy pickups correctly. It was an awesome feeling to be able to step it up and do it right. It maybe my new favourite exercise!!

This is an example of some of things I do week in week out.

updated Rules to surviving personal training

2011-07-12T09:38:00.000-07:00

Over the weekend enjoyed a great movie Zombieland, it was a very cool movie. It got me thinking that there should be rules to surviving personal training. So bear with me as I have a little fun here.

Rule #1 Cardio

Just like in the movie Zomieland cardio is very important part of surviving your session with your personal trainer. Yes your trainer will push that cardio is a good thing and most likely the treadmill will be your new best friend. What I have learned is that starting on the treadmill before your session is a good thing, makes for a happy trainer. Happy Trainer = great session :o)

Rule #2 Vomiting can only happen in the locker room bathroom or learn to swallow

Let’s not kid are selves there will be Vomiting, when you feel that it coming the best thing to do is to head for the locker room weather you do it or not better to be safe, then to have to swing a mop.

Rule # 3 Never ever say “I can’t do that”

Those 4 little words turn your trainer into the Drill Sgt. from full metal jacket. Nobody wants that!

Rule # 4 Crying is for the shower or the ride home

You may have urged to cry when you finally do something that you could not do before or that you are in that much pain. In my experience it best not to do this in front of your trainer, it is uncomfortable for your trainer & it may shows weakness. I love my trainer however, any weakness he finds, he likes to fix. Fix it he will!

Rule # 5 do not confess your bad habits

Confession is for church and cops, telling your trainer that you just knocked back a tub of Ben and jerry’s is not a very good idea. This will just make your trainer unhappy! Unhappy Trainer = Burpee’s lots and lots of burpee’s or stairs lots and lots of stairs. However if your trainer asks you if you have cheated, always, always, always tell the truth! They know if you’re lying

Rule # 6 enjoy your victories

Both Scale and non scale victories. You just kicked some ass Enjoy!

Rule # 7 Smile when your body makes those special noises!

Farting and burping is going to happen, get comfortable doing this in front of your trainer, because it is going to happen.

Rule # 8 calling the person saving your life an asshole is ok

Sometimes you will feel like calling your trainer names like “asshole or Satan’s little helper” it is ok because they have heard it all. In my experience he likes it and gets off on it!

Rule # 9 wear something to keep the sweat out of your eyes

Sweat is going to come out of every pour! Keeping it out of your eyes will help when doing stuff like cleans with the kettle bells, nobody want to take one of those to the head.....trust me it hurts!

Rule # 10 when saying “I need a good ass kicking or bring it on” make sure Walking is optional the next day!

You can, & should say this from time to time. However, if you do make sure Walking is optional the next day!! I have done this and when I have it is a very intense session. They know your limits and want to push you beyond them, so egging them on is always fun!! However like I said make sure Walking is optional the next day!!

Rule #11 food is fuel

Eating the right food before a workout is an important key to a good session, if you eat a junk or fast food your workout will not be a fun experience.

Rule # 12 your trainer is always right.

When training from time to time you will find that your trainer has made an error in counting or the order of the circuit, I find it best to let that go, sometimes it is best to not to be right. Correcting your trainer can result in more burpees, best not to argue with the person who decides how many burpees are in your future.

Rule # 13 the only thing worst then saying “I can’t” is saying “I am trying”

Like Yoda your trainer does not like the word try, some say trying is lying, or I will tell you when you’re trying.... saying I am trying will make for an unhappy trainer. Again Unhappy trainer = Burpees lots and lots of burpees

Rule # 14 try to never be late

Being late to a training session or bootcamp will cause undo attention, your trainer has a plan for your session arriving late will result in most likely no rest time, also in a bootcamp I have found if you are late they will give you added attention so catching your breathe is out .

Bumps are still out there

2011-06-25T11:12:00.000-07:00

I have had a lot of challenges to overcome in my weight loss journey in the gym; the first was the same as Po’s old nemesis from Kung fu Panda, Stairs! It was hard but Damir and I fixed the stair issue I had very quickly and I started taking one stair one foot at a time. Next was my fear of falling, it was not the falling that was the issue it was the getting up off the ground. I still remember that Friday like it was yesterday, I came in the gym and Damir threw a mat on the ground in front of me. And said “lay down on your stomach” the fear in my eyes must have been very evident, because he said “just do it, we are not moving on until you do it” when I finally got down on my stomach I remember laying there just terrified how I was going to get up and a little direction from Damir I got off the ground crying the whole time. Then after I was on my feet, Damir saying “again!” It all seems so long ago, that the mind problems with doing certain things were done and over with, I was wrong, I hit another one of those fears this week.

In Thursday’s session we did this workout on the pure motion equipment, we basically went around this huge thing with 10 stations, one was hanging on this bar with your feet in the air, like the money bars when you were a kid. Before we did it I try to do it and was successful, I held it for 1 second. As we started going from station to station, I started to panic, how am I going to do it, when I got to that station I could not do it. It was like I was back starting at the mat on the ground again; thinking there is no way I can hold my body weight up on the bar. Damir knows me very well he said “stop think and just do it” but on the first round I was not able to wrap my head around it. On our rest between rounds practised and did it again. We started the second round and again I freaked myself out about it again, and when I got to the station again I had an issue with it. I was totally frustrated, in the third round Damir try just to mix up the stations and have me do it without thinking about it but it do not work. In the fourth round I told myself that I can do it, Damir would not have me do something I could not do! Did not help, in the last round, Damir started me two stations away from it and I was able to do it once I think in the 1min I was on the station. But it was very clear, my worst enemy, “fat Brian” was stuck in my head. Thursday session was a very hard one and was very mentally tough. So there still many non food related bumps still out there.

Friday’s boot camp was awesome. I decided before I arrived that if there were step jumps I was going to try and do them, instead of doing step up, because I need a win this week after Thursday’s session. As Damir went through all the stations at boot camp, I could tell it was going to be a hard class. When he did the step jumps I smiled, and said to myself, ok you can do it. Sandra and I were Partners. We pick a station three stations away from the step jumps. We did I think 5mins at each session. The first 3 station flew by. I reached the step jumps; I had butterflies in my stomach, just like the day before with hanging off the bar. , so while we were in switch, rest time, I stood in front of the step, I turn to look to see if Damir would approve if I tried, it looked like he was waiting to see if I was going to do it, so closed my eyes and I hopped on the step, when I open my eyes I was on the step but my heels were hanging over a little, that when I Heard, “don’t do that the whole time Brain” come from Damir, I asked “can I try again” “yes” Damir said grinning. This time I did it with my eyes open and I landed right in the middle of the step right where I was supposed to!! I must have the biggest smile because all the girls in the stations across from me were so excited I was able to do it!! It was good to end the week on a high note after not really completing the hanging off the bar!!

Goals for this week are to run /walk 15 to 20 km over the next seven days. To prepare for the 10k in July & the 10k in August that Sandra, Lara and I are committing to do, so come out and join us for the 10k if you can!

Simplicity in the hand of a master is always amazing!

2011-06-16T20:44:00.001-07:00

The month of June has always been a hard month for me. For many reasons, the biggest is that back in 1986 I saw my Brother Cory get hit by a car, and he passed away. I seem to have this black cloud over me in June. I have done amazing things in June as well, I joined that special club of 100lbs down in June, and I started my weight loss journey in June. But for some reason I just can’t seem to shake that black cloud. This year it seems to be harder than ever, I am stressed in all aspects of my life. To top it off father’s day is this weekend and I am not on the best terms with my Dad. Lately I have been thinking about my brother, how if he was here we would totally be hitting the gym together! Kickboxing together, running the 5k together and playing catch. It could be the reason I am thinking about Him more this year is that one on my new closest friend Sandra is the same age he would be and I am doing all these great things with her. It is awesome because we kind of have that connection that I have been missing for awhile.

I want start by saying I love training with Ryan. In order to talk about today’s session we must go back and talk about June 7^th session first. On June 7^th Ryan and I had an awesome session with Damir, the session started with Damir showing us the sled “he said push it” after we did he commented “see how light it is, you will be pushing it the whole hour!! One of you would push it the other will do cardio based exercise until the other has pushed in up and back a number of times! You will then switch!” So we started with burpees as our cardio exercise of course. We did about half an hour, with a few different cardio exercises in there. By now I could tell how long Ryan was going to be with the sled, so when Damir Said “Mountain climbers” for our next Exercise I think I start to panic, I may have even had tears in my eyes. Damir looked at me and said “this is going to be hard, but you can do this!” As I started to do them Damir sat right next to me as Ryan starts with the sled I just stare at the ground and pound them off. That first round I did not look up to see where Ryan was I just kept going. That first round Damir did not say much he just corrected me. I try to do the sled very fast, hoping Ryan would be as nice. The second round of mountain climbers, again I just stared at the ground and I start pump my legs, as I start to slow down that is when Damir Says “go back to the place you were in the first round” I finish the second round and I made it without stopping in that round I do believe and hit the sled. The third round of mountain climbers, the longest round was finally here. This time I started out strong and then my legs gave out and we just started. I got back up pretty quick and started again, and that is when everything else in the loud gym went away and all I could hear was Damir talking me through it. It rocked he was so awesome and I made it through. It was a simple workout but awesome, very awesome!!

Today was a rough day right from the get going. I arrived at work to find out that they still have not finished the new seal on the roof in the area I am working. So it basically rained in my work area all day. So by the time I got to the gym I was not in the best mood. My bus was late, so I was late; Ryan had cancelled because he was not feeling well. So I knew it was going to be intense because one on one with Damir is crazy. As I Came out of the locker room I saw Damir standing on the treadmill with that Giant fucking grin on his face and his hair down. I knew from that moment this is going to hurt!! As I stepped on the treadmill he said “you are only going one minute at a 15 incline” and when the minute was up we hit the weights hardcore. Then back on the treadmill for a longer time and of course it was at a 15 incline. About 10 minutes in it was so awesome, all the shit in my life went away and I began to smile. It is amazing that after 10 minutes with Damir my whole day changed for the better! He has that kind of effect on everyone I think! At 20 minutes in everyone else in that very busy gym just seemed too melted away like on the 7^th, it was amazing, it was like it was just Damir and I in the room. Everyone was still there but my mind just did pick them up.

The session was a very simplistic session, no Giant Tire, no carrying Damir, no hill of hell, just Damir and I with Weights and a treadmill. Like with cooking, Simplicity in the hand of a master is always amazing! The session was one of the best ones I have ever had! Not because it was one on one, it was because he pushed me way past my limits! It was so awesome. Not sure if I will be able to lift anything tomorrow but it was totally worth it!!

I looked like a big fit football player

2011-06-12T19:50:00.000-07:00

I have had a very busy couple of weeks, my Sundays have been full of 4 and 5k walks, but were more like 16k both weekends. Last weekend I did a 12k walk on the arc trainer on the Saturday and did the 4K MS walk on the Sunday. When I was done my legs were so sore! I felt so strong.

This weekend I did took Saturday as a rest day. Instead of hitting the gym and doing 2 or 3 hours on the arc trainer I did my annual fundraiser to raise money for the Alberta Children’s hospital. I shrink wrapped my shelf to a bench at the Wal-Mart I work at for 8 hours. It was much different this year. As I did last year after I was shrink wrapped I had a coworkers take my photo so I could put it up on Facebook right away to invite people down. Later in the day I got a text from Ryan, he mentioned that he was floored by my photo. At the time I thought nothing of it as I was busy with my fundraiser. Later when Ryan picked me up to go out to dinner and a movie He mentioned it again. So while we waited for a table I look at the photo. It blow me away as well, the shrink wrap had made my Apron disappear. Ryan was right I looked like a big fit football player. That is what I would look like if I did not have my apron. Also on my sign was my weight loss, this was the first time I have had people question that I really lost that much weight. Most could not believe I was ever 520lbs, the Wal-Mart greeter that was at the door with me kept saying “no he really was, I remember when he was that big” it was a good day I raised more money than my goal of 520 dollars.

Today I did the Wal-Mart walk with my friend Kelly; we did it in excellent time! Kristy and I had to walk from the 7^th street LRT stop to the Pumphouse Park it was like doing a 5k before the 5k! It was awesome doing the walk with Kelly! Kelly kept me going fast and we finished far from last! The only let down was that when we finished the walk the food they were giving the walkers was Hot Dogs, Chips and Pepsi. I understand that it cheap and they most likely got it all for free from there venders. But come on, they went on about how the walk was a healthy way to start to lose weight. Then at the end of the walk to feed everyone crap!! Well I guess I need to try and change the Wal-Mart Culture.

I was far, very far from last!!

2011-05-29T18:58:00.000-07:00

This is a week I will not soon forget. My week began with a 3 pound weight loss, weeks that start with me being 3 pounds down or more are always great. Damir had two boot camps in one day on the holiday Monday. The first was an awesome, Kristy and I were partners and at the end of the workout my shirt was soaked wet. It was nice to spend time with Kristy doing the thing we love, Exercise.

Tuesday was a very emotional and eye opening day, after an awesome training session Kristy and I watched the Biggest Loser season finale. As we watched all the contestants step back on the scale I noticed that only one of them lost more weight then I have while they were on the show. Yes they did it in four months, most of the time in very controlled bubble not having to do it while working full time. Yes they did really well, but I say try doing it with a fulltime job with real temptation everywhere. My full time Job has a freaking McDonalds in it. That is true temptation, so perhaps I am one of the real biggest losers.

I don’t remember much about Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. I had really great workout on those days but nothing stands out.

Saturday was fun; I started the day on the arc Trainer at 2110 Fitness. I love starting the day sweating! After my cardio I ended up going to Damir’s Kickboxing boot camp to hold Pad for Kristy. I had so much fun working out with her on Monday; I wanted to try to see if we would have the same fun kickboxing. We did it was an awesome class; again it was so awesome to spend time with Kristy exercising. Later in the day I went for a walk with my good Friend Sandra. We had a 5k in the morning so we walked it.

Sunday was such an awesome day. As Sandra and I stood at the starting line it brought back memories or doing it last year. Last year I did the 5k with my friends Ryan and Pam. That was a tough day and I was worried that it would be as rough and I was still concerned that I would finish last like last year. Just as we were about to start Sandra Fist bump me and said “see you at the finish line!”

I started to jog, it was very weird, I was keeping up with the large group, and I was stunned. I was thinking, ok once we get to the end of the street, people will start passing me like crazy. I got to the end of the street and some people had past but not much. I thought ok once we get to the first bridge, people will start to pass me. But that did not happen; in fact I was passing a lot of people. We hit the first bridge I realized I need to figure out how to start moving up the group because this is too slow, so I follow a thin girl as she cut through the crowd. As I hit the beginning of the second bridge if found the large group I would do most of the 5k with. This jogging thing was very new to me; I have done a little with Damir but not as much as I have already done in the first 20mins or so. As I reached just over half way I was walking more then I was jogging, that when my shins started to hurt. I said to myself “no I am still going to jog” so as I started to jog my shins didn’t hurt as much. I slowed to walk and they just started to hurt again. It was like Damir was there saying “come Brian lets go, Jog!!” As I started down the last stretch I saw Sandra walking back down the course looking for me, at that point I was done jogging, and I was just walking. Sandra smile and I think she said “you can totally beat your time if you start jogging again!” but I am not sure as I was not all there. But we started to jog again and walk and jog and walk. As i reached the hardest part of the course the very steep hill close to the end, I saw Kim running across the field to the top of the hill. As I reached the top of the hill Kim said “come on Brian your running to the end with me let’s go!” Here is the thing she ran the half marathon earlier and now she was running again to get me over the line under an hour. So I started to run as I reached the last part where people the lined street, she ran beside me outside the course. It was loud, people were clapping and cheering I could here Kristy and Lara, they were so excited! It was very loud, but I could still hear Kim yelling “don’t you stop” I would love to say I didn’t walk but I did for a few second, then I heard Kim “You can finish running, you can do it” as look to my right I saw she was still there walking fast, so I took off running as hard as I could. Then I saw the clock in the distance, it was under an hour, I started to cry, I past under the finish line at 55:10.08.

I turned the corner and Kim and Sandra were there waiting, that when Lara came running to hug me, Lara was crying, I was crying, it must have been quite the sight. Kristy arrived also crying and put her arm around me and gave me the biggest kiss. It was awesome. I am very lucky to have such great friends and family in my life. I was far, very far from last!!

Burpees Baby!!

2011-05-19T20:40:00.000-07:00

There have been many milestones in my journey, tonight I reached a very big one. In Wednesday night’s boot camp Damir set up circuit training at the top of the “winding hill of doom”. In the circuit Damir put out a ladder, now I usually step and squat up each rung of the ladder which I did the first time through. On my second time through I was doing the station before the ladder, Kim was doing the ladder and I was watching how she did it, she was hopping and squatting up the ladder. I thought I think I can do that. Just as I was about to try, my partner came up the hill and tagged me out of the circuit to do the hill. As I did the hill I was so excited to try and hop up the ladder. Of course when I got to the top my partner was nowhere near the ladder. As I did the circuit I decided I was just going to do it and not ask Damir if I should try. Finally I was at the ladder and I hopped into the first rung. Wow I can do it I continued up the ladder and Damir said something, not sure what it was so I just went back to the old way. That is when I heard Damir “you can’t continue hopping, hop but squat when you land!” so I started to do what he asked and I could do it!! I glanced over at Damir while I did that last one; he had that big ass smile on his face he gets when I reach a milestone. Hopping was a milestone, but not the biggest one I reached this week.

Tonight on the way to 2110 Fitness for my session, it hit me if I can hop maybe I can do burpees without the modification. So after Damir showed Ryan and I what the first part of today’s session was I asked “do you think I can do real burpees now that I can hop” he just smile and said “try it now” . I dropped down and hopped my feet back and hopped forward then popped up. .... I did it!!! Now he was very excited, his smile was huge, this was a very big moment. You could tell he was thinking where he was putting in the burpees into our workout. So later in our session we were tossing the Big Ass Tire and Damir say Burpees with that big ass Smile. So we stop with the tire and started burpees, I was about eight or nine in when Damir leaned in and said “how are your legs, it much harder on the legs with the hopping” wow he was correct about that they just were burning. Although it was hard and brutal, I must have had the biggest smile on my face.

Another great example of my new favourite quote “success is not a goal, it’s a by-product” This was the milestone we have been striving for, see great workout in my future lots and lots of burpees!

"Success is not a goal, it’s a by-product.”

2011-05-15T09:36:00.000-07:00

I have had many difficult weeks on my weight loss journey; none come even close to this week. I normally write about my crazy ass workout. The crazy ass thing this week was not the workouts, they were tough, but this week I was put to the test with my addiction. It all started last Friday when Kim sent me a text, it said I really want you to stop drinking the Coke Zero; it is time to get off that shit! Well that was the just of it. When I arrived at boot camp again it was brought up. She went a little Jillian Michaels on my ass again. I said ok next week I stop drinking it. I did the boot camp and thought nothing of what I said. Monday morning I stepped on the scale and I was down 4.8 pounds. As always I texted Kim & Damir and headed to work. On my way to work I have a habit of stopping at Mac’s to grab a 1l bottle of Coke Zero for the day, and not remembering that I promise Kim that I would quit this week I bought one. As I ate my oatmeal at work Kim texted me back about my weight loss from last week. She was happy I lost 4.8, and suggested I set a new goal. While Kim and I were Texting Damir got back to me. Also happy I lost 4.8 but thought I could have done better. So Kim and I agree 8 pounds will be this week’s goal. That when it happened, Damir said if you don’t eat out and you quit the coke zero you could do it. 8 pounds is possible!!

Ok, yes I started to panic a little, but agreed I would not have another coke zero. I made it through Monday without having at coke zero. At boot camp Damir or Kim not sure which one it was asked if I had any more Coke zero at home. I did I had an unopened case of 12 and two cans left from last week. When Damir heard that and said you won’t lose 8 pounds if you have that shit at home. More about that later.

Tuesday was a blur, it went by pretty quick. I made it through without having a coke zero. It was hard, no it was very hard. I asked everyone at work not to loan me a loonie as I left all my change at home so I would not be tempted. My training session was great. Tuesday was a good day.

Day 3 did not start off to a good start. I did not sleep well, at Monday’s boot camp Damir informed us that Wednesday’s boot camp would be on the “hill of Hell” so I tossed and turned all Tuesday night. So on my way out the door I grab one of the loose cans of coke zero and headed to the bus stop. As I waited for the bus I opened the coke zero and smelled it. It smelled so good. As I lift it to my lips I saw the reminder on my left arm, “would Kim approve” I stopped and pour it out. Nope I didn’t even have a sip; I promise I would not do it so I did not. About 5mins or so after I poured it out Kim texted me “How’s it going, U ready to do the hill!” it was like she knew I was slipping. Kim is awesome like that, she will send out a support text just to see if I am on the ball.

The “hill of Hell” was great I was able to make it up the hill the first trip up without stopping. At the top of course it was not catch your breath and go back down, nope not in Damir’s Boot camp we did a Tabata workout at the top it took about 4mins. So when I went down the second time as Kim was just coming up to the top, so I tried really hard to make it back up before she started to run down and I did it. The third was hard, but I rocked it. On the fourth time, I was at the bottom of the hill when Stephanie came up and said hold this for me, it was her very cute Dog and I said I was good and she started to run up the hill. That is when the dog I was holding took off after Stephanie, the dog pulled me up the hill, I ran faster then I have ever run before. It was awesome, when we arrived at the top, the dog was panting, I was panting even more then the dog I think, I just laid down right there in the grass. As I am lying on the ground I hear two thumps beside me. I open my eyes and Damir is standing above “Cleans with the kettle bells, let’s go Brian!” I stood up and did the cleans until he said to stop. It was an awesome Boot camp!!

Thursday was a though one, but I made it though without having a coke zero. Now for the past month or so Thursdays have been Big Ass Tire days, in our sessions, Damir would have us do something with the tire. No Big Ass Tire This week! It could have been because a class was working out in the fake grass, but that class did not go the whole hour of our session. It could have been Damir wanted to change things up, but I am pretty sure that the tire is like Burpees, it is a staple in working out with Damir on Thursdays. I like to think he was taking it easy on me as I was giving up the coke zero. Don’t get me wrong the Thursdays session was brutal just not the normal extremely brutal!!

Friday Day 5 Coke Zero Free this was a hard day. I really wanted a Coke Zero!! But I stayed strong and did not cave in and have one. This was also a though day because one of my biggest supporters at work was going on Mat leave and Friday was her last day. Jocelyn has been my food cop at work. Many times in the beginning she took chocolates, chips and candy right out of my hand. Always excited when I lost weight and she kept me grounded. I am really going to miss her.

Friday’s boot camp was intense. I showed up to boot camp with the 12 pack of unopened coke and handed it do Damir and said “I don’t need this shit anymore” it was a good boot camp.

Saturday Day 6 still coke zero free. My Saturday started with cardio at 2110 fitness. I do 2 hours of cardio on Saturdays.

On the TV show Friday Night Lights there was a line that coach Taylor said that will stick with me for a while "Success is not a goal, it’s a by-product.” This week I feel I have been very successful, whether I lost my goal of 8 pounds this week or not. I have worked very hard to cut out my addiction. Next week I will stand tall, and maybe it won’t be as hard.

I am a very lucky guy

2011-05-05T21:52:00.000-07:00

I have been blessed with an awesome support team. I am a very lucky guy. How many people can say that they have friends that will go above and beyond? I have said this many times “Friends don’t let Fat friend eat at MacDonald’s!” Last week I had a very hard day at work, I have been working alone for awhile and on Tuesday this snowball out of control. I decided to skip lunch, mistake number 1, when I was able to finally take a minute to eat I went to MacDonald and grabbed a Big Mac and a cheese burger. On my way to the staff lounge to inhale it, a friend saw I was slipping and took the bag out of my hand and threw it in the garbage, And said “I know your having a bad day, but you are not eating that on my watch, one day I will slip too Brian and when it happens I want you to help me the same way I am helping you.” Although I didn’t eat it I beat myself up over it. I am supposed to be stronger than that.

This is not the only time I slipped, this week I was upset about something not really sure what it was, but it was when I was leavening work, I grabbed my favourite chocolates. At the till my good friend saw I was slipping and said “I will ring through this stuff, but I am not ringing through the chocolates sorry, and I am telling all the cashiers at the front not to ever ring them through for you. YOU DONT NEED THEM.”

Now I have been on this journey for 23 months, next month it will be 2 years. I have learn allot, but for some reason I still have bad days. This week I have been struggling with the food, so I decided enough is an enough and I was reaching for something bad to buy to eat, when I stopped and thought if I had a reminder on my right wrist I may think twice about what I was eating. So before my day really started today I had a Friend write in permanent maker on my right wrist. “345, would Kim Approve?” now the 345 is this week’s goal, 7 pounds down, I figured lets shoot for the moon! It worked very well; I had a much easier day!!

Now, support also comes from my fellow boot campers! Boot camp is always fun, and I have allot of support. If I stop to catch my breath either my partner or the person beside me says “come on Brian let’s go!” I can honestly say everyone in the boot camp has said it. So thank you Ladies I do appreciate it!! Please keep it up!!

I get a different kind of support in my session with Damir; I do my sessions with Ryan. The support from him is a little different. It’s more of slap in the back of the head, like you see Gibbs do to Tony on NCIS. But Ryan uses his words to slap me. A great example of that was in tonight’s brutal session! We were flipping the Big Ass Tire to each other. Now on the last set of flips I could barely lift the dam tire. So after a few flip I was taking my time, that’s when Ryan said “the slower you Flip, I will flip it faster” so after I Struggled to flip it, he just stepped into the tire very fast and flipped it like it was nothing.....bugger! So I struggled again and he again just flipped it like it was pillow....very fast so this went on until we finished. Damir also likes to pit us against one another, but as of late I don’t catch what he is saying to push us as my heart is pounding and I am in the zone so it usually sounds like “Wha wha wha wah” so I usually hear about it on my way home when Ryan tells me.

I am very lucky I get lots of support from my wife, my friends and my Coworkers. I have so many great people in my Life!

Thank you everyone!!

An Eye Opening Week

2011-04-28T20:16:00.001-07:00

This week there have been many non scale victories, lots of sweat, and some tears. I stood tall through it all. I learned that I need to check in with myself, and believe that I have changed. My body has changed quite a bit and I did not notice the changes it has made in the last few months until this week.

Friday was a great day; I spent most of the day relaxing. Around 4 my wife Kristy and good Friends Sandra, Lara, and I went to the batting cage. Now I have not hit a ball in about 15 years or so. I was not sure I would even remember how to do it. I put in the coin and the first pitch came down and I nailed the ball. Nope I did not forget it came back to me pretty quick. I think I missed about 5 balls out of the 100 pitches. It felt good. From the batting cages we went to boot camp, when we arrived Sandra gave me an awesome red Adidas shirt, with no time to look at it I put it on without looking to see what size it was. It fit well! Many fellow Boot campers comment I looked much slimmer with the shirt on. After Damir kick our asses for the hour I went to change and had time to check what size it was, 3XL wow I was wearing a 3XL shirt! I was so excited I was showing everyone. It was awesome!

On Saturday I hopped on the scale and I was down five pounds this week. After getting off the scale I grabbed my Alive and Empowerment shirt that was made for the Santa Shuffle. It did not really fit when we did the shuffle back in December. It also fit me, so I wore it to kickboxing.

Now kickboxing was an intense class, Sandra was my partner. Sandra does her roundhouses at the same level as my head; now on our last set she was kicking a little lighter than normal. Then all of a sudden she kicked very hard and I did not expect it and the pad and her foot hit me in the face! Almost knocking me down, but I recovered my balance and we finished. Thought for sure my nose was bleeding, but it was not. It was a very eye opening experience.

Later that evening Kristy, Ryan, Cheryl and I went out to dinner. When we arrived at the restaurant there were not tables left, just booths. Now in the past this would mean that we would have to wait, feeling good from fitting into a 3XL shirt, I felt like trying to see if I fit. Yes I fit, it was awesome! I have not been able to do that in many years.

Monday’s boot camp was good, Justine was my partner and she was good at pushing me to go hard. The hour flew right by!!

Tuesday’s Session was a crazy circuit, it began with this exercise that was different. I had to stand in the middle of thisCircle bar thing that had very heavy weights on it. So i had to squat twice with it and walk to the end of the fake grass. Squat twice again and Walk back. I had to do it 20 times. At the time it only hurt my hands to keep the weights up. Now we did burpees and a few other exercises, then we did sledge hammer slams on to the big ass tire and a few more Exercises, I think clean and presses were in there. Then we started the whole round again.

Now the circle bar thing with the heavy weights on it did not really hurt at the time, but when I woke up on Wednesday it was a whole different story. It hurt so bad I could not lift my arms very well; my shoulders were so tight it was a very hard day. It made kickboxing a very sore hour. It was an interesting experience.

Tonight session was very intense. We started with cardio. Now a treadmill experience with Damir is no walk in the park. I don’t think he knows the treadmill works when it is flat. No he likes it at a 15 incline and no holding on. After the treadmill, it was the Crank bike, he called it our recovery time. Yeah my heart is pounding out of my chest and the crank bike is my recovery. It was more like the treadmill got the heart rate up, and the crank bike kept it there. So when I got back on the treadmill I would barely be able to keep on it. After I think 4 or maybe 5 rounds of that Damir Said “take a small break.” So while we caught our breath Damir goes over to The Big Ass Tire and moves it onto the fake grass. I am thinking here we go again. So we head over to the Big Ass Tire and Damir says “flip the tire down to the end and back. Your second exercise will be with the Sled” Ryan smiles and heads over to the Big Ass Tire, so I started with the sled. Now the whole time I am pulling the sled I am thinking how it is I going to flip that tire, I only lifted it once. So when it is time to switch, Damir Says “Brian you could have given me a little more with the sled, you better lift the tire with a little more effort!” Busted, but I don’t think he realized the tire was messing with my head. Now I squat down and lift the tire, as I get it just over my knee I rest it and quickly switch my hands and push the tire down, it was very hard to do, but I could do it! So I Flip down and back, as it hits the floor on the last flip Damir hands me the Sledge hammer and says “Slams now.” I start hit the tire with the hammer, my heart is flying out of my chest, and I am think when he said we were going to doing the hammers slams. I finish with the hammer slams. Then we started the next round. Now this time, I pounded out the sled with a whole new attitude because the tire was not on my mind. Damir was much happier with that round. After the second round I thought we were done, I was exhausted. But Damir Says “one more time” so I pushed through and finished with the sled I dragged my ass over to the tire and started, I Struggled with the first flip, but got my 2^nd or maybe it was my 5^th wind and I flipped it with much more strength and made it through the end of the session.

It was an awesome week! I really love the whole Circuit training thing! In my mind there was no way I was ever going to flip that Big Ass Tire!! I wish I Believed in myself the way Damir Believes in me!

Climbing back up on the horse

2011-04-20T19:40:00.000-07:00

Climbing back up on the horse

Last week I started boot camp and training again since my fall a few weeks ago. You would think it would be easy to jump back in. It was not; my day back at boot camp I was very excited to jump back in, but my body was not. Damir set up the boot camp so there were 3 area’s with 4 stations in each area. My first stop was burpees of course, as I started I noticed I was very nervous about dropping down and I did my first set slowly. Now I am not sure if Damir notice but when I was done he mentioned that in he was adding burpees to each area and I would be starting with burpees in each area. By the end of the class I was doing them like I normally do.

On Tuesday I walked into 2110 fitness for my training session, and I noticed a Big Ass Tire in the middle of the floor. As I got changed I was worried the tire was going to make an appearance in my session. After I got changed into my gym gear, I bumped into fellow Alive member Sheenah, as we got caught up one of the Trainer from 2110 came over to the tire we were standing beside, got excited to see it and dropped down and picked it up very smoothly. As he put it back down, Sheenah asked him how much it weighed? His replied was 300lbs. I started to smile, because I was sure we would not be lifting the tire. Ryan arrived and Damir went through what are session was going to be. It was all weight training; now I think I was really smiling... no tire. As always, I forgot that Damir has that special power of reading me like a book. Just as I was about to start he says” but, before you ladies start I want to see if you can lift the tire” All that was in my mind was “FUCK!!” Ryan went first he dropped down and struggled, but he got it up. Now it was my turn, now I am thinking I am not going to be able to do this. I squat down and only get it five inches off the ground. Oh well I tried. Both sessions were all weights & Cardio.

Wednesday and Saturday’s kickboxing boot camp was a lot of fun. My new Partner Sandra was awesome she pushed me hard and when she saw I was struggling a little with my wrist when I did the burpees with my boxing gloves on, she helped come up with something else for me to do. Also she made me laugh all the way through the class it was awesome!!

This week has started off with a bang, before boot camp on Monday I got together with Sandra and played catch for about 45mins. It was awesome!! Then boot camp was very intense. I think I may have had another first as I did push ups on my toes for the first time.

Now the last few weeks Kim cut my calories down quite a bit, I was not exercising as much or as hard so it made sense. Now this week she adds a few more than normal. Just looking at the new rotation on Monday, I knew Damir was going to go crazy and turn it up a notch. Now day one was today, but Damir thought day one was yesterday. So yesterday’s session was insane, in the first 5mins he had my heart pounding out of my chest. It was the fastest I have ever got to the puking stage. Of course my first exercise on his crazy mini circuit was Burpees; I asked if he meant dirty burpees, his response made me cringe, “Brian from now on when I say burpees I mean dirty burpees for you”

On my 5^th round of burpees I noticed Damir moving the Big Ass Tire onto the fake grass. As I finished with the burpees and other three exercises in the set, I am thinking “here we go, another tire workout, and this tire is much heavier. And I can’t even lift the dam thing”

As I take a small breather to catch my breath I see what the tire was for, Ryan and I are going to swing the Big Ass Tire back and forth. Ok now I am thinking I could do this, what is the most we will do pass it back and forth 10 times, so I start us off, pass it to Ryan, at this point I am thinking this is not that bad, he catches it and passes it back to me. it was like being hit by a linebacker it came down hard and very fast. After we had passed it back and forth about 20 times I drop it and before it even hits the ground I knew exactly what Damir was going to say “Brian Burpees now” which he did back. So back at it we go after Ryan and I have passed it back and forth 50 times we moved on the next thing in the circuit. After the first round we go back to the Big Ass Tire, and of course Drop it again and do burpees. while i am doing burpees Ryan picked it up off the ground with ease. So now I am thinking there is no way am I not going to do it as well? During our break before out last round I get my chance! Damir knocked over the Big Ass Tire by mistake and went over to pick it up, I piped up no let me try. He stopped and I could tell he was debating it in his head, but I insisted, so he got out of the way. I squatted down and I put my hands under it as far as could to grab on. And I lifted it up off the Fake Grass it was awesome!! The last round right flew by. As Damir put stuff away he asked “Was today, day one of adding more calories?” I answer “no tomorrow is” that when he said “oh shit, today’s workout Was supposed to be about that” he smiled and walked away. Now this is very scary, if he can see I can do what I did yesterday on very little calories, What is he going to through at us tomorrow!!

Oh how I am Missing Training

2011-04-09T10:14:00.000-07:00

Oh how I am Missing Training

It has been 11 days since my last training session. Lost is the best way to describes how I feel. I started training to lose weight. It is still about weight loss, but now it is much more. Pushing my body past its limits, the happiness that comes from the feeling of accomplishment when you master a difficult exercise, my heart pounding in my head, the soreness in my body the next day, and the pride that comes from spending an hour getting my ass handed to me from Damir. I miss it all!!

A great circuit training session has an awesome rhythm to it. The first Round in the circuit is like a warm up round. It goes smooth I find my comfort zone, the second round is smooth, but it seems to go by fast and I can feel the comfort zone slowly disappearing , the third round is a hardcore pushing me way past my limits, my heart is pounding in my head. Round four is usually a big blur, my heart coming right out of my chest; I am feeling no pain, just high! Circuit training with Damir is by far my favourite kind of session. I love it more than kickboxing. Oh how I miss that.

Weight training session is awesome, a much slower more focused. It is a different kind of session. I like it just not as much as circuit training.

Boot camp is a whole different beast. Monday & Friday is like a circuit training session, with a great group people all pushing hard towards the same goal. It is awesome to work in a group. There is always someone there to push you hard. Sometimes the push comes from another boot camper kicking ass beside you. Sometimes they are pushing you by giving you a gentle encouragement...unless I am working out next to Kim then it’s not gentle at all, as she likes to push me hard! No time to catch my breath if she is beside me!! ... Everyone so positive, I missed it so much.

Last night I was in the room working out on a cardio machine, but it is not the same as doing the boot camp. Standing tall, Sweating through Damir's crazy ass boot camp together. Looking to you left having the person next to you working super hard, looking to your right seeing another pushing through ... It rocks!!

Wednesday & Saturday boot camp is kickboxing and if you have been following my blog you know I love kickboxing. I missed this so much as well!!

Cardio on the hamster wheel or the elliptical is good, but it is not as great as training or Boot camp. I can get my heart pounding and my body sweating on the machines, however it seems I cannot push my body past it limits.

Monday Everything goes back to normal I can't wait!!

the other shoe

2011-04-03T15:04:00.000-07:00

the other shoe

It has been a tough week, I sometimes talk about my fear of the other shoe dropping, well this week it did. Tuesday’s session I was finally settling into 2110 Fitness, Damir was seriously kicking Ryan and I’s ass. I was doing well with the food thing; life was starting to feel normal again. That’s when the other shoe dropped!!

Wednesday I was just cleaning up at the end of my shift when I lost my footing and fell, twisting my ankle like the top of a bottle, falling hard to the cement floor. I am sure the on my way down I tighten up my core, like I do at the gym, and just like every other time I have fallen I use my hand and forearm to stop the fall. It was the hardest impact I think I have ever had. While I was on the ground I was thinking ok this is not that bad I will lay here a bit, and catch my breath. Then I started to try and get up, and I was in extreme pain. As I lied there I was thinking shit I am not going to be able to go to kickboxing boot camp for sure. As my co workers rallied around me to try and help me up, that is when the worst case pop in my head, I broke a bone in my ankle & I won’t be able to train for months. After getting in a cab, headed to the Doctor I started to feel a lot of pain in my left hand. So as a half empty glass kind of guy that I am. I really start to panic if my foot is broken and my hand is broken how I will get around.

After many , many, many hours at the doctor I found out my foot is not broken, just sprained and my wrist may have a broken bone in it that does not show up on an x-ray for ten days, so I need to wear a splint for the 10 days.

So his means no training or boot camp for awhile. No exercise sucks, last year about this time I had to take time off from training for illness, I climbed the walls at home. It has been 5 days and I am already climbing the walls. My support team is being very positive, I was not so positive. I know I am not in a race, when it comes to my weight loss. But I am so tired of this fat suit I wear every day, the sooner it comes off the better. I first saw this as a setback. Now I am thinking it time to put my eating habits to the test.

Now I wanted to skip the whole weighing in thing this week! Kim was not to keen on that, so I stepped on the scale and I was up 2 pounds. I started to freak out! Last time I gained Damir said there would be consequences to a weight gain. Damir is a no excuses kind of guy so I thought for sure I am up the creek.

Kim calmed me down, and I texted Damir, who as could tell from my text I was upset. He calmed me down. Reminded me everything happens for a reason, and I will come out of this strong then I was before. Now I don’t know about that!

Kim has decided this is a great time to work harder on my body and my food so Tuesday I am starting some sort of cleanse thing, i used to make fun of that shit.... now i have to do it. Of course I Googled it and I must say I had a good laugh and thought why am I going to do this again.... that’s when I remembered that I said I would do whatever Kim and Damir wanted. They both seem excited for me to do it. So I guess after this week I can’t make fun of people who do Cleanses anymore...

This week my plan is to stay standing tall and I hope to be at the very least to be back on the hamster wheel before Friday.

Damir’s Circuit of Doom

2011-03-29T20:45:00.000-07:00

Damir’s Circuit of Doom

Ok now I must say Damir is on fire, our training sessions have been on an entire different World. Now I think he knows my cardio is not at the same level as it was at alive, so he is kicking the shit right out of Ryan and me! Last summer we did a circuit outside with a giant tire. Our workouts now make the giant tire circuit feel like the good old days.

Tonight we arrived early, so I hopped on the elliptical because I don’t like watching Damir set up the sessions, because as he sets it up and if I see what he is thinking I tend to cringe at stuff I don’t like. I prefer not to have time to think about what is coming.

He set up a circuit that I am going to call “Damir’s circuit of doom!” At first glance I thought it was going to be an easy session, but I was wrong!! The first exercise was ropes, some call the ropes “ropes gone wild” I say there is nothing wild about the ropes. The rope was tied to the weight sled so when we were done playing with the ropes, you had to Squat and pull the sled up to you. Then push the sled back! Next we did plank rows, 15 each arm. Then it was off to the Ball slam.... I love the ball slam!! Next it was what I am going to call “the punch in the face”; it was like last week with the green ball full of water. This time it was a red roll full of water. Again I popped it up in the air like Damir said and it came down on my face and my neck. It really sucks!!! Next it was Dirty Burpees.....yeah Baby!! Gotha to love those. The TRX rows were next, that was supposed to be the last one, but Damir threw in Squat clean and press.

After the first set, Damir said let’s do it again, but this time we will add and a pull, push with the sled!!So I start going hard on the ropes and pull, push. That’s when it hit me this whole session is going to be this circuit. So I take my time pulling back the sled, of course Damir notices and yells lets go Brian!! So I turn it back up, and pound off the push pulls, Plank rows and ball slam. I started with the dam water filled roll and bang I figure it out, pop the roll up like you would bump volleyball. It worked!! I thought holy shit I did it right!! I pound off the rest of that set pretty quickly.

As I finish the second round, I went to sit and grab water my heart was just pounding in my head. Damir said something to me, but all I heard was “wha wha wha wha” ... so I got up and started my next round as I picked up the ropes, Damir said 3 times now with the sled!! I smiled and started with the ropes, and gave it my all on the next three stations. That is when my heart felt like it was coming right out chest. But I pushed on as hard as I could because I Was thinking it was the last round. After I finished I went and sat and grabbed my water bottle. Damir says lets go Brian we are doing five rounds today! As I walk over to the ropes I am thinking I am not going to be able to do this again my heart is just pounding hard! I do the ropes and I start pulling the sled, now I am having a hard time pulling it back, then something someone said earlier in the day slipped in my head I don’t know why, but it did. “This is where we separate the boys from the men!!” That is when I get this second wind I did not think I had. So I pound off the sled and I just go full tilt on the Plank rows and Ball slams! As I picked up the red roll filled with water, which is when my body had something to say, and bang I vomit in my mouth, and swallow. After that it seemed to become easier. So I finish the fourth round and as I start walking to my water bottle Damir say right away Brian you only have to do the sled a fifth time. So I pound off the sled and I must say it was an amazing feeling to finish the circuit without really bitching about it. Like I said Damir is on fire!!!

I can already feel my body stiffening up! I hope I can Walk tomorrow!!

Summer of Possibilities

2011-03-28T20:33:00.000-07:00

Summer of Possibilities

In my weight loss journey I feel I am close to big changes this summer. I will do many of the things I have always wanted to try. Basketball, this maybe the first thing I will be able to try. I am hoping this summer a few friends will get together on a Saturday and play some basketball. I have never really play basketball, but am very excited to give it a try. Also maybe ride a bicycle maybe in the cards. Although I have not even been on a spin bike, I am hoping to blow the dust off my bicycle, give it a tune up and go for a ride in fish creek. I really want this, so I am pushing hard in sessions and with the food to reach this goal.

I am also excited to do a little hiking in Fish Creek & maybe try a small hike in banff. But first I will be running a 5k I'm May, last year I did this 5k, walked the whole way it took me 1:26 to finish. This year I am hoping to run and walk it and push hard and finish in 45mins.

I would also like to play softball, Walmart sometimes has a tournament during the summer, if they do I am going to give it a try.

Also I would love to try boating of some kind. When I was in my teens I used to kayak. I would love to try that or maybe try a canoe. The summer has so many possibilities, this is going to be the best summer ever!

The one thing I am going to defiantly going to do is playing catch. I do believe I have many friends that like to do this, so I am going to try and do this as much as I can do!

I feel amazing, all my hard work feels like it really is taking me where I want to go! If I stay on on this path I will be in the 200's by September. The last time I was in the 200's I think I was in high school. I don't remember what it is like to be in the 200's, i am guessing it will make life a lot easier.

Jail yard chain squat lifts from hell

2011-03-24T20:52:00.000-07:00

Jail yard chain squat lifts from hell

Funny right when I think Damir has settled into a groove with our training, he surprises the shit out of me. On my way to the gym tonight my Buddy and nutritional Coach Kim sent me a text message “last night’s training session was insane”. So I knew he was in one of his crazy moods, what I did not know is that it was going to make me literally cry like a little girl!

As I came out of the change room tonight, I saw Damir showing Ryan the first part of our First set. I thought it was a joke... from time to time Damir makes a joke like that, showing us something crazy and then just before we did he says just kidding. Not this time!! So I choose to do the crazy thing first, I am calling it “Jail yard chain squat lifts from hell”. So this is how it went Damir put the heavy bench press bar on my shoulders with two heavy chains attach to the bar and had me sit on two step up steppers. It was insane. I thought there is no way I am going to be able to do this. As I stood up the first time my whole body shook. I did ten, with a breather in between. I switch over to do what Ryan was doing, biceps curls and over head press, and Ryan went over to the “Jail yard chain squat lifts from hell”. As I started to curl the weights I heard Ryan say stop in a voice I have never heard before. That when Damir and Clayton grabbed the bar off Ryan’s Shoulders very fast. In fact I have never seen two trainers jump into action so quickly before. Damir modified the squat lift for Ryan, as put the weights down from the Curls and pressed Damir Say “now Nine “ and pointed to the bar with the chains on it. As I walked over to the bar I said to myself Damir would not make me do it if I could not do it so time to cowboy up and do it with confidence. That is exactly what I did.

The next two sets was normal stuff we have done many times before, Step ups and squat rows, chest flies and triceps lifts. However the last sets pushed me beyond my limits! First I had to throw this ball full of water in the air from the squat position, catch it and do it again. The problem with this is that when the ball comes back down it hits me in the face, it was like being punched it the face. So I have done that about ten times I think. Then I switched with Ryan, to squat pulls with the rope tied to the weight Sled, like I did last Friday with the steel beams in the truck at work. Once I had pulled the sled to me I had to push it back and do it again. Problem with this was I wanted to run the sled back, but the dam rope kept getting in the way. After pulling it back and pushing it back, Damir said back to the ball. So again I throw that ball in the air and it smacked me in the face! Damir try to help me figure out how to do it without the smack, but I just couldn’t .again I switched over to the pull and push. And banged that out! That when Damir said “one more time” As I started the ball hit me square on the nose and as I continued I started to cry. Of course I stopped because ...... well because I started to see stars. Damir saw that I stopped so he added a and extra pull and push to Ryan, and yelled lets go Brian. So I pop that ball back in the air and it came down and hit me again in the face..... But now I was mad so I just kept going taking it in the face, did it about two more times before I switched. Now the pull and push was much easier to do because I was pissed, so I pounded that off, even with and extra one pretty quick. As Damir gave us the traditional great job hand slap, I just laided down right there in the fake grass and took a minute to collect myself... It was an extreme work out and it blows my mind!!

“Staircase of doom”

2011-03-20T18:16:00.000-07:00

“Staircase of doom”

As I was writing my blog this morning my phone honked, as I looked down to see who was sending me a message I laughed, because the night before I had mentioned to Sandra that if it was not to slippery I would like to join her on the stair case on Memorial drive. Yup it was Sandra, we are doing the stairs! So off Sandra, Lara, Kristy and I went to Memorial Drive to tackle the stairs.

We decided to park at the top so we could start by going down. Now since I have started my weight loss journey this set of stairs has been daunting, always saying one day I am going to conquer them. Well that day was today. As I started down my first trip, I found the steps very wide which made it hard to go down them 1 step 1 foot at a time; with a little modification I was able to do it. As I reached the bottom I said to Sandra “that was not that bad!” Sandra replied “you have not gone up yet Brian” as I started up that is when my heart started to pound, half way up I stop to take a breather. That’s when I heard Damir’s voice in my head “LETS GO BRIAN, THIS IS ONLY THE FIRST SET!!” So I started going almost right away. That first set going up I only stopped that one time. When I reached the top I immediately started going back down, going down that second time was much harder than the first. As I was going down I met Sandra going up I Gave a supportive high five. Now the second time heading up I wish I could say I only stopped once but that would not be the truth. I stopped a few times. As I reached the top I took a little breather, as Sandra was finishing her third and last set. I headed back down for my last set I passed Lara coming up and gave a supportive high five. At the bottom I took a small breather and head back up the third time. This set my legs felt like Jell-O but I pushed through and made it to the top only stopping 3 times of maybe 20sec each time. On my way up I passed Lara going down and she gave me a much need Fist pump and said you got this! At the top I had the biggest smile, I had did it conquered the “Stair case of Doom” I was so afraid of!!

Out of Place

2011-03-20T09:11:00.000-07:00

Out of place

Out of place is the best way to describe how I feel is week. I started my week retraining at a different Wal-Mart, 3650. Now I have been with Wal-Mart for 19 years on Friday, so I know more than a few people who work at the 3650. Most of them have not seen me in many years, so it was 3 days of bumping into people who only know 520lb Brian. You would think this would be an experience of how do you like me now, and pride about my weight loss journey. That is not how my brain works, I feel uncomfortable in about the whole thing, mostly because I am still process things like a very big person and I am embarrassed that I was ever 520lbs. I know I should feel proud of my accomplishment. So at work I was out of place in the beginning of the week

Monday’s workout was the closest to being back in my happy place. It was running suicides on the “Hill of Hell” with Damir’s Triple Threat Boot camp. Yes an hour of running, walking, running, puking, walking ... not stopping was the closest to feeling in my happy place. It is official I am very crazy, but I am ok with that. I would say that the “hill of hell” was easier to do this time I am a lot stronger. It also helps to do the hill with a group of great friends, who were very motivating. It was a blast.

Tuesday’s training session was at another new gym, 2110 fitness. Just like last week it was intimidating walking into a new place again. Kim again talked me through the doors. As I walked in I notice the Empowerment big black MMA dummy, so I knew it was going to be an awesome workout. Also it was nice to see some familiar faces from Alive there, Joel and Nadia were there which made it seem easier to walk in there. As Ryan and I began our session you could tell Damir was very comfortable there. He just kicked the shit out of us. It was a workout that went by very fast as he did not give you time to think or breathe. It was an awesome Session!!!

Wednesday’s kickboxing boot camp was held at 2110 fitness, it was a great class. Damir put me with Sandra, who was an awesome partner. She pushed me very hard. It was also great we had a great time together, we laughed almost the whole time, and it was a great class. We sweated our asses off.

Thursday’s workout was a little lower key as we did weight training, it was good.

Friday I had one of those days where things were again out of place at work. We received a truck full of heavy steel fixtures for the store. They were put on the truck with a forklift; some were on skids some were not. There was a point when we became stuck trying to figure out how to pull one of the heavy bundles out of a very tight spot. You could not get behind it to push it out, I could wiggle it a little from side to side, but it would not work pulling it out that way. As a few people were outside the truck on the dock trying to figure out how we were going to move it, as I looked at it I thought it can’t weigh much more than Damir so, I grabbed a tie down strap and made two handle, wrapped the handles around the middle part of the bundle. The co worker that was on the truck with me said “that's not going to work....you are going to hurt yourself.” I smiled and walked back three steppes and looked at him and said" watch this!" I squatted just as I have done hundreds of times with Damir as I came up I yanked and it move a few feet towards me, I stepped back three more steps and squatted again and yanked as I came up and it move even further. The guys outside the truck ran in to see how I did it; I think those 20 year olds were amazed I was able to move it. Also it was great that I was able to keep up with the 20 year olds lifting and pulling the 2 hours it took to get everything off the truck.

Friday night I did Damir’s Triple Threat Boot camp, it was a good class, and we were at Results fitness again and Damir made a very intense circuit, it was awesome!!

This week It was very hard, I miss all the Smiling face from Alive, that place has been such an important place in my life, and a very big part of my support team. Yes I am able to see some of my fellow Alive members in passing and at boot camp, but it is not the same. I hope they are all doing well!! This week I was able to lose 3 pounds, not bad for a week of feeling very out of place.

Kim turned into Jillian Michaels!!

2011-03-12T13:43:00.000-08:00

Kim turned into Jillian Michaels!!

It became very clear this week that Alive is much more than 4 walls and workout gear. It is a community, we do stand together. Holly and Ben have created something much more than just a place to work out. I have been saying the secret to my success is the great community I am a part of. This week confirmed that fact. Walking into a different place was hard, but it felt good to go and see my follow alive friends there kicking some butt.

Saturday’s kickboxing class was sure different, Ben was awesome he kicked our asses good without any kickboxing gear. It was awesome to watch his mind work and put together a great workout with very little. Paula was my partner today and it was awesome. We worked well together; my favourite combo today was the bare knuckle super punch. She just hit as hard as she could, missing my hand only once punching me in the chest. We both laughed, my chest hurt her hand more than my hitting my hand.

Also this week the food has been going very good, this week I really enjoy the mean plan. I have stepped way out of my comfort zone. I found out that I like couscous, it was one of the best salads this week, and I really enjoy hummus.

I did have a moment of weakness this week, Thursday night after Kristy went to bed, I was upset over the Alive closure, and I binged on cucumbers, hummus and crackers. I thought it would be ok, because it was not chips I was wrong. On Friday Kim asked me how I was doing with food and I told her about my mishap the night before. It was like a scene out of the Biggest Loser; Kim was sitting on the couch when told her I had an extra snack of cucumbers, and hummus. She was annoyed but said why that was wrong. Then she asked if that was it. I told her about the crackers, and she turned into Jillian Michaels from the Biggest Loser, she hopped off the couch and got right in my face. Laid right into me, I have never seen her that way. It was a good thing, she got her point across. Like I said I am a part of a great community. Now I know Don’t go off plan.

Friday Ryan and I had a visitor in our session, Kristy joined us. It was fun to see Kristy doing the same stuff as us. She did really well, she was able to keep up and kick some ass. It was a different kind of session, as always Damir kicked the crap out of us. But it seemed to go by fast. I was not comfortable at first, being in a new place and all. But the changed pretty quickly as Damir pushed us hard, I had no time to even think about what was going on. When we were done our session and after my encounter with Kim as Jillian, Ryan informed me that he and i were doing Damir’s boot camp. I was tired from our session, so i was like i am not sure if i could do it. That is when Kim piped up and said something like “oh your doing the class dude ...... you ate fucking crackers ..... your doing it!!” so i got to workout hard for two hours With Damir it rocked!!

Pushing Around Damir

2011-03-10T20:32:00.000-08:00

Pushing Around Damir

The last two weeks have been very similar to pushing Damir up the hallway of doom. You start out with a great big push from deep down in your legs, as you hit the kicking shield you feel him pushing back, as you start to move him down the hallway with momentum you start to feel like this is going to be a breeze, then he gets his footing again he starts to push back a little harder, by now you are over half way and you dig even deeper moving your feet one after another, your almost at the end of the hall and he put the brakes on and it like pushing the wall!! But somehow you move the wall forward. Now you are at the end of the hall, he says breather. Just as u start to feel your heart rate start to decrease, he says ok lets go back and you start the whole journey back 60 feet up the hallway again.

My big Push

My big push came from a small 130 pound woman, as you may have read my nutitonal coach has changed, and she is a little spitfire named Kim. Holly laid the foundation of my nutritional eating habits, which I am sure was like pushing a wall. Now Kim is building the frame of the house, which I am sure is like pushing a smaller wall. I say that because I don’t like change. Kim changed everything, everything! Now I eat oatmeal, and like it. In my first week I bought the wrong oatmeal, I went to superstore and bought instant oatmeal, because I only bought instant before and it was the only thing there that said oatmeal. I was supposes to by oats, plain oats. That first week I choked down the instant oatmeal and bitched to Kim I didn’t like it! she figured out I bought the wrong one and fix that. In week 2 I try the oatmeal her way and now I like oatmeal. It tastes so much better! I also eat something different every day. This is new to me as I like to stick to the same stuff because I know it works. Also she now has me cooking my meals one day in advance; this was hard to get used to. I like to cook everything off all day Sunday, she put an end to that, I can prep stuff for the week on a Sunday, but I must make it day to day. I think it is to show me I can live like a normal person. She is doing an amazing job, she checks in on me to make sure I have my eye on the ball; she has kicked my ass when needed. I am very lucky to have Kim in my life!

My Momentum

In the last two weeks I have lost 11 pounds and hit a very big milestone 151 pounds down. This is a big mile stone for many reasons. When I started my journey I always said stuff like this is going to take forever, I need to lose 300lbs. Well as of Friday I have passed the half way point. I am now 369lbs. When I lose 15 more I will be at the same weight I was at when I married Jennifer the first wife.

Pushing the Wall

Tomorrow i will be walking into a different fitness center, this is very scary ....... here is hoping i can move the wall forward.

Lost more than a Kim

2011-02-27T21:14:00.001-08:00

Lost more than a Kim

The last few weeks have been an interesting; I was able to prove to myself that I am a weight loss cardio warrior. On my week off from Wal-Mart, after Kristy’s surgery I wanted to see if I could push my body to its limits. I committed to Damir that I would do 2 hours of cardio plus my session or class each day. So Monday I did the “hill of hell” with Kim, it was awesome we kicked butt on the hill, after the hill, I hit the hamster wheel for 30mins to make it a 2 hour cardio session. Tuesday I arrived at alive around 2 and did a 2 hour hamster wheel session, took a small break and did an hour training session with Damir. Wednesday was day my body hit the wall. After pushing hard with 2 hours of cardio on the hamster wheel, I thought I was going to be kickboxing for 30mins and holding pads for 30mins. That did not happen went full tilt for the hour with Damir holding pads for me. It was brutal I came home and just fell asleep. Thursday went the same as Tuesday, so as Friday came around I was a puddle. But it was worth it, as I dropped 5 pounds to bring my total to 140 pounds down.

In the last week I have had a few of changes in my life, the atmosphere at work has made a complete change. It is must more tense. My nutritional coach has changed to my friend Kim, which has changed my food and when I eat completely. My cardio after my session was cut out, so Kim could make sure we were doing the food correctly. So Damir changed Ryan and I sessions this week to a much more cardio focused session. Tuesday’s session was intense, he pushed hard but nothing to crazy. Thursday was a totally different story, it was insane!! We started with 110 burpees and 110 rope slams, this was hard. I just kept focused and pushed through! After that we moved onto 110 Ball slams and 110 Ball walls tosses. This was like the calm before the storm, so I was able to blow through that pretty quick. We ended with what I think is called plank rows 110 of them.... but I could be wrong, and 110 judo stand ups again could be wrong about the name as well. The rows were not as hard they were in the past. But the judo stand ups, this was very hard. In the past I have only been able to do ten. Now Damir want 110, I did not think I could do that many, but I got into a rhythm and was able to do it. It was an awesome session.

After my 2 hours of cardio on Friday I weighted in. I stepped on the scale and it stop on 374 lbs. That was a 6 pound loss for the week! I was 146 lbs down!! I have lost more than what Kim weighs; I lost more than a Kim!! It was an awesome week!!!

The Rollercoaster

2011-02-13T10:46:00.000-08:00

The Rollercoaster

This week was like being on a rollercoaster, lots of ups and a few downs and it felt like I was going 100 miles an hour and I did something I never thought would ever do. I learned a lot this week, a lot about my body, my endurance, my diet, and my wife.

My wife

Let’s start with Kristy first, most of you know Kristy went into the hospital to have surgery to receive a lap band on Friday. Kristy called it a gift, now I must say before she began this journey to receive the lap band I would agree it with her it is a gift. That is far, very far from the truth. I think a gift is given to you, this was not a gift. It was a lot of very hard work; it started with classes and end with what I can only call the toughest, most restrictive diet I have ever seen. Now I knew wife was a strong woman, hell she lives with me, but I never thought she was that strong! She tackled that diet head on, when she first told me about the diet I wish I could say I knew she would do as well as she did, but I know there is no way I could have done it. As she did the diet for the 3 weeks I thought for sure she would have to cut out or at least cut back her Personal Training. No she kept going, no those are not the right words, and she did amazing! Training, Kickboxing, the bike, yoga, she pushed hard. The day before her surgery she was RUNNING STAIRS in her training session, after 3 weeks of only 900 calories, she ran the stairs. The day of her surgery she went into Alive for her training session at 7am. Yeah I would say she worked really hard for that so called Gift. I am so proud of her!! What she did is amazing!!

My Body and my diet

As always Damir kicked my ass this week, my workouts were not as routine this week as I like. I missed Monday with a migraine, so I start off way out of my normal routine. Tuesday Damir had Ryan and I do a circuit of weight training, it was a good session, however I would have to say only I could find a way to get one of my boys caught between a box step and a 16kg kettle bell. So let’s say the rest of the session I may have been walking funny. Wednesday I did kickboxing boot camp, it was a great class, and Lisa was there, so it was nice to have one of my regular partners to workout with. During boot camp I was called out a little, when we were doing mountain climbers Damir yelled “ if you are doing this to try and lose weight you need to be going faster” was not sure it was directed at me, but during the next set it was confirmed, as I started to do them he yelled Again but this time he made it clear who he was talk to “ come on Brian we went through this last time... move faster.....Thank you” Thursday I was late for my session as I had to work a little later and I missed my bus. When I did finally get it was the kind of workout I love weights and cardio. After my session I walked on the treadmill for an hour. Friday I went in a 7am with Kristy and I did the running program Damir made me on the hamster wheel.

Thursday was also weighed in day, I was sure that in the last two weeks I lost a good amount of weight. I knew this week was not awesome but last week was very, very good, it was a high cardio week. So I stepped on the scale and I did not lose anything, in fact I gained one pound. I was a little upset, I could not figure out what I did wrong. Holly, Kristy and Kim tried to calm me down, but I was not in a place to listen. On Friday I got off the hamster wheel and I grabbed the scale, Ben and Kristy were talking and Ben said something about the scale to me as I grabbed it, I not sure what it was but it calmed me down about my gain and as I walked to the locker room to shower and weigh myself again, it made me feel that if I weigh the same I must own that weight and look at my food and exercise log and figure out where I made an error. Yes the scale stopped right on 385, so I need to own that gain. When I got home after Kristy surgery, I looked at my log and I think I may have found my error. I will give my log to holly on Monday to confirm what I am thinking is my error.

My Endurance

Saturday morning I went to Alive and did Damir kickboxing class, now some of you may be thinking what the hell, Kristy is in the hospital and you went kickboxing instead of going to sit with her. Well if you know my wife you will understand, she wanted my ass at that class. In fact her last words before I left the hospital Friday night were”you better be at kickboxing in the morning”. Now I can say it was the best class I have done in a long time, not because Damir had awesome combos, which he did, not because it was a very full class, which it was. It was because my stress was all gone, and the drills in between combo seemed easier ,I did burpees with ease, the mountain climbers I was moving my legs so fast, Damir did not need to call me out, Damir even through in one of my favourites, the inch worm. It rocked!! After kickboxing I rested for 30mins and after that I did Ben Awesome boot camp, when you do Ben’s boot camp you never know what crazy thing he is going to put in there. Once he had us lift the steps we were using for step up over our heads and squat, like Rocky did with the giant pole in Rocky 4! Sometimes he will put in kickboxing as a treat! It is not all just step up step down; however there seems to be a lot of steps. This week we did some kickboxing in the class and that was very cool. Ash was my partner, and he is awesome, he works very hard. Ben’s class goes so fast, and the great thing is I have a better range of motion so I am able to do most of things in his class without modifying a lot. The best thing is that my endurance is there were I can do two classes on a Saturday morning.

Bring It On!! Again

2011-02-03T20:54:00.000-08:00

Bring it on again

Tonight’s training session was very insane, as I was getting ready for my session Damir ask “What do you boys want to do tonight?” Before my training partner could answer I got a great big smile on my face and said “the Treadmill workout we did last week” Damir looked at me with a very surprised look as I am sure he thought I was going to say Kickboxing..... I always say kickboxing. I am not sure but I think he said “really or maybe seriously” it is possible he did not say either of those things, it may have just been what his look was saying it. So I piped up “Really....BRING IT ON” he replied “oh am going to bring it!!”

Now if remember from my “rules to surviving personal training” post, rule number 10 was never say “Bring it on” to your trainer, so I have just broke that rule. There are consequents to breaking that rule. I have done it in the past, but I am now in much better shape then i was the last time i said that. So this session was insane!

I decide that I would start on the treadmill as I was thinking that last Tuesday’s session the hard part of the set was the treadmill. I will get that over with first. So I jumped on the treadmill and I started to jog. On the treadmill beside me was Diane, she has not been at alive for a while so she has not seen me run yet. I was almost done my first set on the treadmill and I felt this poke in shoulder, I jumped off and Diane Said “oh my you are running on the treadmill now, that is awesome” I said “Thanks” and finished up on the treadmill. So I was done with the treadmill and I started up the hallway to the back of the gym, and Damir was at the end of the hallway with the Lebert buddy system in his hand and wrapped it around me and said “Sprint down the hallway.” I ran as fast and as hard as I could down the hallway, it was the fastest I think I have ever gone up that hallway pulling him. We went down and back, when I came back I stop to catch my breath, Damir Said “lay down on the bench” I said “one sec let me catch my breathe” he Said “no break, lay down” I got on the bench and handed me 2 45 pound dumbbells to do the chest press. I banged them off and stood up and he popped the Lebert buddy system around me and said sprint. I paused to catch my breath and he yelled “Go Brian” I ran again as hard as I could up and down the hallway. Now normally in Damir’s sessions you don’t do the something more than twice in a row, so I gave it my all think that was the last time I will be sprinting up the hallway. I was wrong!

As I workout I go through several stages, Stage 1 my heart is pumping I am start to sweat and the pain starts, usually in my legs. Stage 2, my heart is pounding in the front and in the back of my head, the pain has disappeared, and I am high as a kite. This is my favourite stage! Stage 3 I vomit, I have been here more than a few times, so I can usually swallow it. Now before tonight I have never gone past stage three, normally after I vomit I slip back into stage 2. But tonight I went through stages 1, 2, and 3 in the first 10mins. So as I got on the treadmill for the second set, a new stage appeared. After jogging for about 4mins I started to get a stitch in my right side, I have not really felt this before so I stepped of the treadmill to catch my breath, as I did that Damir appeared and ask what was wrong, I told him and he said “what speed were you going when you got the stitch” I said “3.2” he put the treadmill back to 3.2 and said “get back on and finish” I got back on and finished. I got off the treadmill and found Damir at the front. As I walked up front Damir Said “ ok Rest” He must have just told Kim that I experienced my first Stitch, Because she piped up and said “Wait he gets to just rest when he has a stitch” and Damir Said “no, you’re Right, Brian walk up and down the hallway with your hands on your head.”

As I walked up and down the hallway with my hands on my head I was think well at least we are not doing sprints. I was so wrong about that it!! So unbelievably wrong!! As I came back up the hallway with my hands on my head I think it was the third time, Damir was standing at the end of the hallway with that Dam Lebert buddy system in his hand.

He wrapped it around me and said “Run” I ran up and down the hallway as hard as I could, which brings us to another new stage. Stage 5, Now I think Kim calls this stage “in the zone” but for me it more like seeing red, I can’t feel any pain, I am feeling very, very, high and I don’t really remember much at this stage. What I do remember is after that set I saw Kristy coming up the hallway and I stopped and put my arm around her and said “ I Love You” she look at me with her OK puzzled look on her face. That is when I added “I just wanted you to know that in case I don’t survive this session” after that which I am sure was the half way point of the session. I don’t remember much, But Kristy has told me I was yelling a bit and so was Damir!

What I have learned from this is that I love that kind of session where Damir pushes me way past my Limits, oh and I learned Again don’t say BRING IT ON!! Unless I am ready for a real ass kicking!!

2011-01-30T16:45:00.000-08:00

16 pounds!

What another great week it has been, it started out with a fine that needed to be paid. So on Monday Kim put me through a workout of burpees, alternate Cleans and even more burpees, until I reached 200 burpees. After Kim kicked my ass, I ran on the hamster wheel. It was a great workout! But the week did not start out all good; I started to feel a cold coming on.

Tuesday at Alive was a learning experience, When I arrived Damir was putting together our workout plan, when Ryan arrived, he asked Ryan what he want to do, Ryan being Ryan looked at me, smiled and said treadmill! Damir was so excited he threw the writing pad he was using on desk and jumped up and look at me, laughed and said “Sam pick a number between 1 and 5” “5 of course” Sam replied. Now I knew when she said 5, this has going to be one bad ass workout. Damir pointed at the hamster wheel and “said Brian jump on. So I climbed on and he said “what speed do you run at?” I said “3.5” he set it to 3.2 and said “run at this speed for 5 mins, then jump off and switch with Ryan” now I have done 3.5 for 1 min & he wants me to go for 5mins at 3.2, I was not sure I could do it but I was able to do it of most of the session, the first time I got off we did kickboxing up and down the hallway, the second time I hopped off, Damir was Busy talking to someone so Clayton stepped in and after doing alternate cleans I had to push Clayton up the hallway, although Damir and Clayton weigh the same, but I struggled to push him up the hallway. At the end of the hallway I push press with the red kettle bells, then I had to push Clay back down the hallway, it was even harder to do, not sure why but my left knee was hurting so I kept pushing Clayton into the wall, but he was a good sport and laughed it off. We kept going on and off the treadmill for an hour. It was a great session. It would have gone a little easier, if my cold was not bothering me.

Wednesday, I was so sick from my cold that after work I just went home to bed. Thursday I had a very rough day at work. On my way out I was picking up some items, while I was going through the till I gave in and grabbed a pack of Ferrero Rocher, as I was waiting for the bus I texted Kim and told her I was thinking about eating them and taking the burpees. She talked me down from eating them and we decided that I would give them to her after my session. Ryan and I session was good, but I don’t remember much from it. There was a very hard Kettle bell set at the end of the session. After the session on the way out I hand the Ferrero Rocher over to Kim, I was thinking she would just throw them away. No she open them and handed one to me and said “ open it, Smell it now crush it” I did that for all Three chocolates, my hands were full of chocolates goo, I went back into alive to wipe it off, Kim followed me to make sure I did not lick it off. Thanks Kim for the support, I needed that.

Friday was awesome; I was off so I went in early and did a hamster wheel workout. I learned on Tuesday that I could push harder on the hamster wheel. So I put the speed at 4.0 for the program and was able to totally rock it. I was on the hamster wheel for 2 hours. After the hamster wheel workout, I weighed in. The scale was very good to me; I weighed in at 384 down 6 more pounds. That means that during January I lost 16 pounds! Or 4 pounds a week basically!! It was a great Week!!

250 Burpees

2011-01-19T21:43:00.000-08:00

250 Burpees

Wow the week has not even really started yet and I am behind the 8 ball. It all started on Tuesday, I was in the locker room getting changed at alive, when Damir walked in. He had that funny grin on his face so I knew something was up. I asked him if I should grab a treadmill right away since Ryan was not going to be there tonight, also I hoping that we would spend some of my training session on the treadmill so we could work on the whole running thing. He Smiled and said no you need to talk to Holly! I said oh am I in trouble? He answered do think you should be? So he just answered my question with a question, translation I ate something that was not in the plan.

So I head out to talk to Holly about last week’s log, just than one of my support team walked in, it was Kim the one who is helping me take accountability for my health and Attitude. Thinking holly was going to call me out on eat some smart pop popcorn, I said let’s talk here about the log, because I am thinking Kim already knows about the popcorn. It was not the popcorn that I ate that Holly pointed out that. No it was Bacon, yes I forgot about the bacon! 2 slice of bacon with my breakfast I had in my first week end on the plan. Holly was great, she broke it down and showed why the bacon was the wrong choice, and she even show me a much better choice I could have made. She is awesome!!

Now this new made Kim very happy, 2 slices of bacon = 100 Burpees! Just the other day I made her do 100 burpees for a negative comment. So she was happy to hold me to my promise to eat clean or pay the price with Burpees. It works out to much more burpees, but we will get into that a little later.

Now Damir and I were just starting out my session and my bacon error was fresh in my mind and in his. We started the session with Damir saying something like “bacon, seriously Brian” or maybe it was “you know how I feel about pork.” With the bacon thing fresh in my mind I said something I wish I never said, but I was thinking I would ask Damir for a wakeup call if I started to gain weight again. I asked Damir “when I gain weight again can you put the 65 pound dumbbells in my hand so I remember where I start out. This really pissed him off, he said “when you gain again” and walked off to get heavier Kettle bells for my workout. He grabs the biggest black kettle bells and returned. Then he said something I will never forget he said “Brian you think everyone gains weight on their weight loss journey, you are wrong you can do this without gaining any weight during your journey, you could do it just like so and so they did not gain anything since they started their journey”

Ok as we started our session I noticed that all the weights were much heavier than the ones we started with. Now maybe he set up with the lighter ones thinking that I would have more trouble with them then he thought. however after our little talk everything seemed to get a whole lot heavier. It was sort of like when he found that cheesy on me. Our session as so good that it flew right by; before I knew it we were done.

Later Tuesday night I looked over my log and notice that we went out for breakfast on Sunday and I ate 3 more Slices of bacon. That is when I took a deep breath and did the math, which is another 150 burpees on top of the 100 Burpees I already have to do. So I informed Kim that we need to do another 150, I think she was stunned, but was going to hold me to it.

When I got to Alive tonight I let Damir know that I had 250 burpees to do, He smiled and said he would talk to Kim about how I was going to pay for the burpees. Kim arrived and Damir had a word with her and we went to the Back and started to do the burpees, Kim said to do 20 burpees and she put down the med size black kettle bells, after I finished the 20 burpees without really stopping, A personal best for me, she had me do 20 each arm Alternate Cleans with the Kettle bells, Damir had made a work he said would count toward my burpees fine. As I did the Clean Kim said “Brian I think you may have really pissed Damir Off, this is not an easy workout” well it was something along those lines. I just smiled and kept going. What I think Damir did was he set up a workout with the kettle bells that is very difficult to do, but I am sort of good at so it made the overall burpees count not seem so Daunting.

After Kim kicked my ass for about 20mins or so it was time for kickboxing boot camp. My regular partner was there so it was awesome to work with her. Like I said before when you work with someone more than a few time you get into a rhythm. She went first and I pushed her a little. In fact I think there was point where she was punching really hard because she was a little angry with me, for making her do a burpees when she mess up the combo a few times. It was awesome! Now when it was my turn, I was still a little winded from Kim and I workout, so I was not hitting as hard as I usually do. So Lisa said “stop hitting me like I am a girl” it was awesome that she called me out, I love it. So I try a little harder. Boot camp Rocked!

So this is what I learned so far this week, I can do my weight loss journey 100% of the time or Kim, Holly and Damir are going to hold me accountable, and beat it into me. This is what I think I need right now, so thank you Holly for keeping me on track and thank you Damir and Kim for holding me to my word. Also I learned that Bacon is not worth it!! It may taste good, but it is not worth it at all!!

A week of many firsts

2011-01-15T17:09:00.000-08:00

A week of many firsts

This is a week I don’t think I will soon forget. It was a week of many firsts. I lost my fist 10 pounds of 2011, I ran my first running program on the hamster wheel, and I did my first set of spider planks. It was a great week to exceed some of my short term goals

I wish I could say that I did not worry too much about my weigh in this week, in the beginning of the week I was not even thinking about it but Thursday came and I started to panic, what if all the work I did this week inside and outside the gym was not enough. But when I stepped on the scale on Friday I was down 10 pounds! It was awesome because over the Christmas break I gained 10 pounds. So it was nice that two week in the New Year and I have taken all the damage I did to my body off.

Wednesdays night’s kickboxing boot camp was very awesome, to start off my regular partner was there. Damir had us doing some awesome, harder than normal combos. It was intense, got my heart pumping. In one of the breaks between combos he had us doing the usual, Burpees, than punching with light weights. While we were punching with the weights I could near Damir throwing down mat on the ground. The timer beeped and he said Spider Planks as I put my weights down I notice I had a mat too, normally I would have to do dirty burpees while the class does spider planks and Damir doesn’t usually give me a mat for that. So I Dropped down and tried to do them. As I did the first one I almost fell down on the mat, because I was amazed I could do it so I pounded another one off and he said switch arms, I thought for sure I was not going to be able to do it leading with the other arm. But I did it. I stood up very excited that I was able to do it. I asked Damir “did you see that?” he said “see what” “the spider planks I just did” he said “no I missed that” and I am the thinking you have to be shitting me. So in the next break we do the same and I pounded them out again. This time he saw me do them. The next day I asked him if he wanted me to do them when he gave me the mat. He said something like “I sometimes forget that I do everything in class and I just put down a mat for you as well” this was awesome as I can now do them.

Friday Hamster wheel workout I tried out a running program, a simple program, but it was hard for me to complete. I ran on the hamster wheel for 30mins for the first time, 1 min running and 1 min walking. Now I have heard Jenn, Kim and Jocelyne talk about how they love to run. Before Friday I thought they were full of shit. But now that I have done it, i could see how this is so great. I have decided to add this program to my Friday workouts and see if I can build up enough to run the 5k in May that would rock.

I am off to a good start this month, and I am excited to see what my next weigh in on the 29th will BE

What the Hell!!

2011-01-09T15:46:00.000-08:00

What the Hell!

I am one week into the whole 60 days eating clean thing and it is going great! I do feel I am back on track. The food tastes amazing; I forgot that when all the other processed crap is in your diet, the good health foods don’t taste as good. But wow when you cut them out boy everything starts to taste so good. An example of that is that I never like potatoes in the past. In order to eat them I would have to smother them in sour cream and bacon or put cheese on them. This week Wal-Mart did not have any sweet potatoes, so I had to get baby potatoes for my lunches. The first day they were ok, but by the end of the week that all I talked about is how great they were. I also have been having salad with Balsamic Vinegar along with chicken when we get home from Alive, and wow that has been so good as well. So far I love the food. It is awesome!

It has not been all easy, last night we went to the movies at canyon meadows theatre; if you have ever been there you know they set up the big mazes line for the concession. Last night I stood in that line for about 20 mins for 2 Diet Cokes. That was hard, the smell of popcorn was very strong and as I stood in line I stared at the big bags of M&M. As I was getting to the front of the line I was starting to think I was really good all week one bag won’t hurt! Then I remember that if I get and eat that bag, Kim is going to make me pay with at least 150 Burpees, it’s a big ass bag she might say it is worth 200 or 300 burpees! Finely it was my turn and all that came out of my mouth was 2 Diet cokes please. Besides I had an apple and a nectarine in my jacket so I was good if I needed a snack.

The workouts this week have been very intense and insane; I put 10 hours in of hard work at alive this week. It has been awesome! Wednesday I was finished work early so i was able to put in an extra hour on the hamster wheel, & I didn’t have a partner for kickboxing boot camp so Damir was my Partner so I got to punch and kick for the whole hour. It was awesome!! Thursday’s Training session we worked on Biceps, Chest, and triceps, it was intense, the next day I was not all that sore, at first, as the day went on it hurt more and more. Saturday my whole body hurt, my legs, my Chest, my arms....Everything!! My triceps still hurt today and it is Sunday! What the Hell!

Every day I put two hours in, by Friday I was exhausted and I didn’t want to stay on the hamster wheel for two hours. I hoped off for a break after an hour and about 15 mins in to pee and say hi to a few friends at the lobby, but Damir was setting up his boot camp and notices I was screwing around and quickly put an end to that, and I was back on with a feeling I better stay on here a little longer to make up the time when I hoped off.

This week is going to rock!! I weigh in on Friday and it should be a good weigh in. I am going to stick to my food plan and put in as much time sweating as I can!! I have not had this feeling in a long time; I can’t wait to step on the scale on Friday!!

Bam Back to Reality!

2011-01-03T21:26:00.000-08:00

Bam Back to reality!

Well I guess I had fun over the holidays, stepped on the scale tonight to start my new year off to a good start, and bam back to reality! I gained some weight back, some weight that is a not whole truth, I gain 10 pounds back. This is not the news I was hoping for, but I have fallen off the wagon over the holidays. Now is the time to step up and get control of the food. Food is my drug of choice, when I am feeling bad or upset I turn to my friend the potato chips and ice cream. Thinking this is going to make me feel better, but it never lasts long, in fact after I feel just horrible. I beat myself up for eating it, but that does not stop me from reaching for it the next time.

Going into the holidays, I was just getting over the flu and I thought that I could handle everything. The last time I step on the scale I dropped 7 pounds just before the holidays. Then as the holidays began I kept saying to myself just keep on track, you can do it. However stress got the better of me and I just let go, I started with a small bag of chips and then I started to slip, eating everything I could get my hands on. It was a bad place to be; once it has started it is hard to stop.

Now before this all happen I put together an action plan for the New Year. It is a good plan and I am going to execute it well. I am going to put up some reminder around me how easy it is to fall off the wagon and start to slip back into old habits. Old habit = weight gain and I cannot have that I need to keep going. I have worked way too hard to get this far to just to throw it all away. This is not going to happen!! I am not done yet.

I start my plan tomorrow; I am excited because I am in the right head space now. I know what I have to do to have all my dreams come true. I need to step up and Do IT! I just have to Control the hard part. The hard part is not working-out everyday. No that is a lot easier than most people think. The hard part is dealing with my emotions and not turning to food for a stress release. I need to remember food is not for pleasure. It is fuel for my body. I need to get back to where I turn to the hamster wheel for stress release or maybe pound on the heavy bag when I am upset. This is the hard part!

I have to stop lying to myself, yes I have lost a lot of weight, but that is not enough! I am much stronger than I believe I am. I can eat what I need to everyday, and not put the poison in my body. I need to remind myself that junk food is really just poison! It is not ok to have a chocolate bar here and there. It is not ok to skip a meal here or there. The bacon and the sausage on Sunday morning must go, because this is why I am not doing as well as I could.

I have made a promise that if I say something negative about myself that I owe Kim 30 burpees. This seems to be working, so here is addition to that If I fall off the wagon and eat any poison in the next 60 days I will owe 50 Burpees for each item. Example (1 package of FERRERO ROCHER has 3 chocolates = 150 Burpees)

I am either doing the work or I am not. I cannot keep working this hard to just stay 400lbs, I will be in the 200’s before the end of the summer. Food is not going to stop me!!

So I guess I have learned a bit in the last year and a half at the Alive.

2010-12-27T19:45:00.000-08:00

I arrived tonight at Alive to get some sweat in, it was been a hard week so the hamster wheel just was not going to cut it, I needed to work hard and not think about the last week or so. When you are on the hamster wheel there is a lot of time to think, this is not what I needed. Damir had just left and I decided that I would try to put something together that would make me sweat hard. As I changed into my workout gear I made a plan in my head. I would do interval training on my own.

So this is what decided to do for the first 45mins or so:

1. 3:00mins combo on the heavy bag

2. 45 sec wall squat

3. 3:00mins Hamster wheel with an incline of 10 at a 2.7 speed

4. 45 sec Burpees (yes I did burpees without being told to do them)

5. 1:00min rest

I repeated this 6 times

It was awesome my heartbeat was in my head the whole time, after the 4^th set I want to stop and take a break, but I thought would Damir let me stop ... no I don`t think so, I pushed on. As I did I felt the like I was going to vomit and I new I was working hard When the timer said that I had finished I still want to keep going, but I wanted to change it up a bit.

Then I changed it up and this is what I end with:

1. 2:00 combo on the heavy bag

2. 45secs wall squat

3. 45secs Trx Rows

4. 2:00 hamster wheel on 0 incline at 2.8 speed

5. 45Sec Dirty Burpees

6. 1:00 min rest

I repeated this 4 times

It was a great feeling to know that I could actually come up with a Great workout on my own. It was awesome; I know that I could push myself pretty hard. I do believe that although I push myself it is not the same as when Damir is pushing me. He can push me beyond my limits! I can only get close to the limit line but without him there to push me over the edge I just won’t go there.

People have made this comment to me on more than once in the last few months, ``you have been doing this for over a year now do you really still need a trainer`` to this I always say if you have never trained with a trainer you don’t understand they do more than just teach you what to do, they take things to the next level, always raising the bar! I although I could put together a workout where I sweated my ass off, I need Damir there to kick me over the line and make me do stuff I never thought I could do and point me in the right direction!!

It is nice to not be sick anymore, it was a long week !!

"Pain is temporary, Pride is forever"

2010-12-24T09:28:00.000-08:00

"Pain is temporary, Pride is forever"

With 2010 coming to an end and my Birthday around the corner I am reflecting on what an amazing year it has been. Looking back at 2010 I am in surprised at what I was able to achieve in only one year. 2010 started with me not sure how I was going to reach my first goal of 100lbs down before June. At first I was very cocky as I came out of the holidays with a weight loss and not a gain. I was cocky because I lost weight while I started to slip with the food. In full addict style I thought I could eat what I wanted as long as I worked hard at the gym. My weight loss stalled and I slipped deeper into my food addiction. This went on until the middle of March this was tough time. Damir I am sure frustrated with my attitude, we started to have a very different kind of workout, we did weeks of cardio on the hamster wheel. It was very hard on my body, because we were pushing so hard, and I was eating crap my body gave out and I started to get a cold, which quickly turned into pneumonia. The doctor made it very clear I was not going to get better unless I stop working and training & rest so my body would heal. So I was stuck at home for 2 weeks to recover. This was a very telling time, with time away from Alive and work gave me time to heal and think about how hard I was really making it on myself.

In order to keep my weight in check while I was not working out I need to eat very carefully. Coming back to Alive in April I had a better control of my addiction and I was eating better six days out of week, that is when Holly and Damir told me I could still make it to 100lbs down by June if I eat as clean as possible and step up the cardio. 37 lbs in 7 weeks, I first thought it was impossible. But I put my doubts aside after my first training session with Damir, right after our meeting. Damir Kicked my ass to the extreme, and then put me on the treadmill and said don’t get off before you have walked on the treadmill for an hour. I did it, I was able to work out for two hours and I did not die. So from there I just committed to myself that nothing was going to stop me.

June came and I was able to do it I lost 100lbs in my first year, it came right down to the wire, but I was able to do it. I have heard this saying at a weight watchers meeting , “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” now I don’t know if that is true or not as Skinny I have not been in a very long time, however I can honestly say nothing feels more awesome then realizing that you have lost a 100 lbs!! I wish I could tell you when I first realized that or when I first felt proud at what I have accomplished. But it was not a one day you feel it kind of thing! Hard to believe maybe, but for me it was when I over heard some talking about their weight, then it hit me,I lost what they weigh, as much weight as another person weighs! That is when I realized that I am in a very exclusive club, over 100 lbs of weight loss!!

Now, I don’t deal well with success, it was not until a very close friend for mine pointed out that it is ok to be successful. That Pride is not an evil thing. I work very hard and I should be proud of that. Pride is not being cocky, pride is very good thing. Fearing success is not a normal way to live. So I have embraced this and I want take this to the next level.

Looking back at 2010 I did what some said could not be done; I hit the 130lbs down mark! I now know that I can take this to the next level. In 2010 I broke the 400lb barrier! Now I am going to challenge myself to do another thing some say can’t be done! I am going to break the 300lb barrier before the end of the summer! Time to put everything I have learned to the test. Time to step it up! I know if I can hold it together with the food I can make this goal! Like many Great people have said in the past "Pain is temporary, Pride is forever"

myworkout Dec 2 2010A.wmv

2010-12-02T21:57:00.000-08:00

Movie

2010-11-19T22:30:00.000-08:00

Stumbled

2010-11-11T16:14:00.000-08:00

Sorry that it has taken over a month to write in my blog. I had allot of head shit I need to deal with. It all started about 3 weeks ago, I forgot why I was on this weight loss journey and I lost my way. I was in a lot of pain and began to think the pain was not worth it. So I just let a few things go little by little I started to slide backwards. I was still going to alive, I just didn’t have my heart in it and I did not push myself to 100%. Damir was on vacation, but I don’t think it was that he was not there that I stumbled. I am sure if he was there it would not have gone on for two weeks, he would have called me on it sooner. I believe everything happens for a reason, so while Damir was gone I learned some important things about myself. The first was that if I stop, even for a short time the weight comes back! The second is that although I still need Damir’s help I can pick myself back up when I do slip. The third is that if I feel myself slipping I need to ask for help. Before Damir came back I had already started back on the right road, giving it 100% at Alive and with the food.

So much has happened since my last blog entry I gained 11 pounds and lost 6 of those pounds. I can now hold a plank of 40 seconds. Kristy was chosen for a wonderful gift, which she worked really hard for. I am so proud of her.

I had some very awesome workout in the last month; Damir was away, so Ryan and I trained with Clayton for a few weeks. That was a lot of fun; he is very motivating and very loud. He pushed me even when I was not giving it my all. His style is different from Damir’s, but it was awesome. I would recommend Clayton, he is an awesome trainer and I am sure I will train with him again.

My regular kickboxing partner has been away so I have been going with Colleen and Jamie. They are very good partners. Last Saturday Colleen and I were partners in Damir’s Kickboxing class, my arms were very sore from my training session with Damir on the Thursday before, during the one of our Combo Stations I dropped the pads to take a rest & we got caught by Damir! He said 10 Burpees now, we drop and did them. At the next station Colleen Accidently kicked me in the nuts; we did not stop with the combo as did not want to have to do more burpees. If you have ever been Colleen partner you know how hard she kicks, I am getting teary eye just remembering.

I wanted a change, so as you can see in the Picture above I have cut my Hair!! Also I have decided to do a video blog on facebook so look to see my weekly updates there as well.

Consistency

2010-10-11T19:53:00.000-07:00

Consistency

It was a very great weekend; it was a nice way to end my vacation. Kristy and I spent Saturday and Sunday at Kristy’s Dads place. It was nice hang out there and playing cards and relax. Kristy’s Step Sister Tammie, Barry and their girls were down from Edmonton. Kristy’s family were very supportive of my weight loss journey. Tammie made it very easy for me to make it through Thanksgiving weekend without slipping on the food this weekend. It is very easy to fall off the wagon at a social event like this. She made sure I stuck to eating healthy; in fact everyone there was very helpful. This is how I was able to weigh in today without gaining. I don’t usually weigh in on a Monday; Friday is my weigh in day. I want to make sure I made it through the weekend making the right choices. So on Friday when I accidently forgot to weigh in, it was an opportunity for me to use that as an incentive to stick to it over the weekend.

I have had a great month on my weight loss journey; I have been very consistent with my weigh in. always a weight loss, in fact I think September has been the best month for consistency since I started. Everything is going well. So why am I so afraid? It is like I am looking around for the other shoe to drop.

Maybe I am freaked out because I will be training with a different personal trainer for the next few weeks. In the last 16 months other than classes, and 1 session that I did with Ben last thanksgiving, I have trained with only Damir. Now I understand why Kristy used to get messed up a bit when Ben was away. I am concerned that while Damir is gone that I won’t lose any weight. Don’t get me wrong I am looking forward to training with Clay, I am just nervous I guess

Or maybe it is the fact that when things are going well I never feel comfortable. This has been the most success I have had, 125 pounds down. I am not used to the feeling of doing something well consistently.

Double Blog Week

2010-10-08T02:08:00.000-07:00

Double Blog Week

I named tonight Training Session “Walking tomorrow may have to be optional”

Not sure how Damir will be able to outdo tonight’s workout, well maybe I am little scared of what it might be. I knew we were in trouble when we were leaving and Damir Says something like “see ladies I am not carrying any equipment, how hard could it be” At first I thought he has kettle bells in his truck since we were walk to it. Nope, nothing in the truck. So as we started to drive to the mystery workout I started to panic. I was thinking the worst. We started to drive up this very large and steep hill, I was freaking out that we would be running up it. But he stop all of a sudden, half way up the hill. That's when I saw the set of stairs from hell. Ryan took off running up the stairs and I started up behind him. The stairs seemed to go on forever. I climbed and climbed and climbed, finally I was at the top, as I turn to go down, there was Ryan lapping me. Down, down, and down I went at the bottom was Damir with that crazy smile on his face, back up he said. Now as I am going back up I start to think, how the hell I am going to do this for an hour. As I got half way up Ryan lapped me again, and I could see from the look on his face he was thinking the same thing. I get to the top again and start back down, that is when I notice Ryan’s going down the stairs with his feet kind of on an angle, turn my feet and go down the same way and it is easier. As I get to the bottom I take a second to catch my breath, as there is an old guy coming down the stairs. As I start back up the stairs the old guys says to me “have a little more enthusiasm” I head back up and I think to myself shut up asshole! Now Ryan is lapping me near the start. I climb back up to the top, my legs are burning like crazy, heart is pounding and I can’t catch my breath. I get to the bottom and see there is another guy coming down the stairs, I turn to Damir and ask if I should wait for him to get all the way down to the bottom, he said last time you have to go up. so I head up, I pass the guy coming down and he says “I take these stairs two at a time this is easy” I just shake my head and keep going up to the top. As I turn to go down I say to myself wow that hour went fast. At the bottom Damir says get in the truck we are done the first part. I am pretty sure I did a few more sets of stairs in between the old guy and the other guy coming down the stairs.... it was a blur.

As I get catch my breath in the truck I look at the clock on the radio and is says 5:18 I think to myself now what, I hope he is not driving us to a bigger set of stairs. The truck comes to a stop at a park, as we get out of the truck I am thinking oh shit here comes the burpees. Nope, no burpees, we follow this bike path a little ways, and that is when I see a hill steeper then “ the hill of hell” Damir gives us the instructions to walk or jog down the winding hill to the bottom when we reach the bridge turn around and come back up. Ryan takes off running down the hill, I pop my ear buds from my iPod in my ears and I start to walk and jog, and walk and jog down the hill. It was very steep and felt like it went on forever. I reach the bridge and head back up the hill at the half way point Ryan is about to lap me, but he doesn’t, he touches my back and head back down towards the bridge. That is when realize that he has to keep doing this until we I get to the top. So I start jogging so he doesn’t have to go back down again. I make it to the top with Ryan only touching once. Ryan and I do the hill one more time.

At the top after the second time up the hill, I think wow we must be done, that is when Damir says lets go we have one more stop. We jump in the truck and he drives a little bit and we stop at another set of stairs, this time we are at the top. It is a wonderful view of the down town skyline. The stairs are not as steep and but seem to go on quite a ways down. Ryan is told to run the stairs as many time as he can, while I do them twice. Ryan and I pound off the stairs, and we head back to the truck. As I got into the truck Damir Jokes "it is getting harder and harder to get in my truck isnt it" Ryan and I spent the an hour together in this session, and I think we only said 3 words to each other. It was that intense. It was so intense I don’t know if we will be able to walk tomorrow..... We shall see.

MY BODY IS A CHANGING

2010-10-06T21:23:00.000-07:00

My body is a Changing

I have mention in the past how my upper body changed dramatically from week to week. An example of this was how my nipples would move on my chest week to week. Now my body has much a different look and feel to it. To start with losing the amount of weight I have lost, my skin has started to hang. Before I had I was big and round. Now I am kind of a pear shaped, with a lot of hang skin. I have weird folds of skin hang on my back when I stand up straight. So when I am kickboxing I sometime can feel it wiggling as I punch. The folds of skins hang off my legs feels weird when I run on the treadmill. When I walk it is not as noticeable, but running feels totally funny. My tummy that hangs down in front of me is called an apron. My apron is starting to have skin hanging on it as well. It also moves around allot more. When I do squat jumps in really flops up and slam down on my thighs. It makes them very hard to do. I finally can almost do jumping jacks, but with the apron not being as full as it was, when I tried to jump opening my legs it came slamming down on man parts so I can’t do the as it was like getting kicked in the nuts over and over again. So I had to let Damir know I can’t do that anymore. Gravity is a bitch.

I have made it into the 300’s. I weighed in last Friday at 399 that was an awesome feeling. The last month or so I have consistently lost 2 to 3 pounds a week. Although September it has been a more stressful month than most, I was able to pull though and lose the weight. As time goes on I am realizing that no matter what comes up if you stick to the plan as much as you can and do the work you can lose the weight.

A few weeks ago a driver came into work that has not been at the Wal-Mart in as very long time. He asked “what happen to the really big guy with the red Mohawk? Did he quit” I said no he is still here; it was me I lost over a hundred pounds. He was stunned; I don’t think he believed that it was me. That was a weird experience to have someone not recognizes me. It felt very good.

My workouts this week have been awesome. I have been pushing myself on the hamster wheel and not wining as much in my training sessions and classes. The pain is still there I am just pushing through it. Tuesday’s circuit may not have had a giant tire in me, but it was a very intense. Damir is in one of his crazy kick ass moods this week. There was a line in a TV. Show this week that best describes what it was like. It went something like this, he didn’t just kick Ryan and I ass, and he sprayed our ass with pledge and wipe the studio with it!!!

Stress

2010-09-25T22:18:00.000-07:00

STRESS

The last few weeks I have learned more about myself and my weight loss journey then I have the in a long time. The first big thing that became clear to me is there are signs that my life style has completely changed. The biggest was how I now deal with stress. The last few weeks my stress level has been very high, from all aspects of my life. I dealt with the stress by diving into exercise, pushing hard on the hamster wheel and I did a few extra circuit training workouts on my own. I would love to say that I made it through the stress without turning to food but that would be a lie. I had a few weak moments, had some chocolate and 2 snack size bags of chips, however I did not binge. In fact there was a week there where my exercise log was at 12.5 hours. Turning to exercise to help with my stress was an awesome feeling.

The second big sign that my lifestyle has changed is that I can do allot more than I think I can. In the last week Damir has pushed me very hard! This week workouts have been an eye opener, the first thing that stands out is the amount of squats I did, the heavy weights I lifted, doing and enjoying Ben’s boot camp, going from lying on the ground to standing up using the TRX in Ben’s boot camp and that I ran on the treadmill at the highest setting I have ever done. So many big moments this week it was awesome.

Moving on, this week the biggest loser started and, I had a much different time watching the season premiere this year. It went like this right from the start, when they weighed in the guy would step on the scale and his weight would be 460 or so and I would think in my head I wish I was 460 and then a few minutes later it would hit me wait a sec I am much smaller than that. We would watch some more, and then some else would weigh in around 430 and I would again think I wish was I 430 then again a few minutes later it would hit me wait a sec I am much smaller than that. This is the first time I watched the season premiere and I was smaller the most of the guys in the ranch.

As I did break a few rules from my pledge so I will have to start limiting down the number of Coke Zero I have in a day, so I can attempt to go a month without it. Also I have done a few sets of burpees for negative self talk. I am going to reboot my pledge on Monday and going to give it all I can to try and make it to November following it.

Very soon I will be saying good bye to the 400’s and Next time I check in hopefully I will be in the 300’s! It is going to be an awesome few weeks coming up!!

The pledge

2010-09-06T17:57:00.000-07:00

The pledge

It has been a tough couple of months although I have lost weight; I have not yet broke 400lbs. Also I have been just getting by staying on my food plan. So I am looking to make a change. Holly has inspired me, by going so long without sugar. I need to challenge myself to do better! So I think I need to pledge make a change and step it up a bit. So this is what I am going to do.

The rules

1. I will only eat Holly and Damir approved food for 60 days. From September 07 to November 07 (with only 2 exception I will continue to drink Coke Zero and on Sunday I can have 4 pieces of bacon.)

2. I will keep my food log up to date 100% of the time. Anyone at anytime can ask to see it, if it is not up to date I will have to do 15 burpees right there. So if I put it in my mouth I must log it. (Kristy, Meghan, Jen and Kim get your mind out of the gutter)

3. No Negative self talk! One of my biggest issues is negative self talk. If I am caught doing negative self talk I must do 15 burpees

4. I must do 5 hours of Cardio on top of my training and Classes a week.

If I break the first rule I will give up coke zero of a month, and I am sure Damir will have a fitness consequence. Damir and Holly may add or change any of the rules if they see fit.

I am 9 pounds from breaking 400lbs and 49 lbs from my Christmas goal. It may have taken me a year to lose the first 100lbs it will not take me a year to lose the second 100. Time for me to stand up and finish what I have started!

Things you never want to hear from your Personal Trainer

2010-08-31T20:24:00.000-07:00

Things you never want to hear from your Personal Trainer

“If You Stop there will be consequences”

I have learned this the hard way. I was doing push presses above my head for 3:00 minutes at 2:50 I put them down and Damir was a little pissed and said were going to it until you reach 3:00 minutes get them back up there. Which I did and it was very hard, but I push through and finished. To this day I always have that in the back of my head; he says do something and I do it without thinking. Once I was getting changed in the locker room and he was training a client outside the locker room door, he Said “let’s go squat” to his client, and I automatically squatted while trying to get dressed. Yes I am well trained

“Today you will be doing only 3 upper body exercises over and over as many set’s as we can get in the next hour”

Translation: tomorrow you will be drinking your morning coffee through a straw because there is no way you will be able to lift that cup to your lips!

“This is going to hurt, but you can do this”

Translation: when we are done, you will be laying in the corner in the crying for your mommy!

“This week all your sessions will be on the treadmill”

Translation: you will puke many times this week and there will be crying in the shower!

“Come on now this is easy! Let’s Go”

Translation: move your ass or I will break out many burpees!

“Pain is weakness leaving your body”

Translation: I don’t care if it hurts! No stopping or there will be consequences

“Come on Brian! You’re using the girl weights”

Translation: the weights are not that heavy, move faster, stop whining like a little girl, Brianna!!

“This is the last time you will have to do this............., until the next set ha ha ha!!”

Translation: yes I will lie to your face to get better results!!!

“This is going to be an awesome workout; I just finished my second XL Timmy’s coffee”

Translation: Oh Shit this is going to hurt.... and there will be Blood, sweat and tears!!

Things you never want to tell your Personal Trainer

“I am going partying tonight; I won’t be at kickboxing class in the morning”

This is not a good idea as when you say something like that all he is thinking about is all the crap you are about to put in your body! He has your phone number, so there will be a wakeup call in the morning, and like we you are told to do something in the gym, your body will automatically get you moving towards the gym for that Class! I have seen this on more than one occasion, where someone who has stated the night before that they will not be there. Saturday morning comes and they get the wakeup call and they come in, still a little drunk, to do the morning Saturday classes.

“I am in a shitty mood!”

This is wrong on so many levels, but sometimes it is needed to be said, but when you do be prepared for an awesome asskicking! As they are going to beat that bad mood out of you!

To be continued.............

Day in the life of Brian

2010-08-23T22:14:00.000-07:00

Day In The Life

My day starts around 5:30am. I say around 5:30 because well it depends what kind of workout I had the night before. If it was a session with Damir, Kristy usually needs to peel me out of bed. It is Thursday morning so I awake while Kristy is in the shower. As I hear the water from the shower I lay there in bed and think about last night workout. It is funny how much things change, before I started at alive the first thing I would think about was what I was going to make for dinner that night and what I was going to have from MacDonald’s for lunch. After starting at alive I my first thoughts were oh my what will I be allowed to eat today. But in the last three months or so my first thoughts are about what workout I did the night before.

Last night’s workout was Damir’s kickboxing boot camp. It was awesome! My regular Wednesday night partner was back from a few weeks off. So last night’s workout was very intense. A good regular kickboxing partner is like having a great dance partner. They know where your punches are going to land, they know when you need encouragement to go faster and harder. They know when to hold the pads lower when you kick so you can catch your breath and they know when to hold them up higher to push you a little harder. If flows beautifully, without missing a beat. Also my partner, Lisa is much taller than me so I get a great workout on both sides, with the pad and with the gloves.

As I hear Kristy turning off the water, that is my queue to start moving. As I put my feet down on the ground to stand up, I take a deep breath in. As I stand up I can feel the pain fire up and down legs. Once I am up I lean back into the bed, hands down as I take some of the weight of my legs as I stretch. This is a morning routine that will help me get moving. I don’t remember what is was like to get out of bed without pain in my legs. As I start moving the pain fires up and down my legs even more.

As I grab my lunch, gym bag and the shake Kristy made for me earlier and I head to the bus stop. As I walk to the bus stop I put my ear buds in my ears and start blasting my favourite playlist on my Iphone. Now my legs are feeling a little better. As I get to the bus stop I pop open my shake and finish it as I wait for the bus. The bus ride is always the same I start preparing myself mentally for the day. I repeat to myself I won’t buy any chocolate on my way into work today. I am strong I will not do it. On rough morning I change my Iphone background to Damir or Holly’s picture to help me focus. I get off the bus and walk across the Wal-Mart parking lot I can feel the anxiety of walking in the doors, going past all the junk food. I take one more deep breath and head in. I walk by the crap with my head down, repeating you are strong don’t do it. I make it to the stairs and I proudly climb them one stair on foot at a time. There was a time I took them one stair two feet, but now I just walk up them with a good pace.

My Job at Wal-Mart is semi physical and very repetitive. The rest of the day is very safe food wise, first because I won’t go back on the sales floor until I leave. Second today is Thursday so there won’t be any free food in the staff lounge today. They do have free doughnuts or cake (when someone leaves), and pizza from time to time, but that mostly only happens on a Fridays so I am pretty sure today is safe.

Things go well until I am about to leave, then I start worrying I won’t be able to make it out of here without buy some chocolate or potato chips. After I punch out and head down the stairs I am in full panic mode, bad thoughts start filling my head, stuff like, you are going to work very hard today you can have a little chocolate. It will be ok. Go for it. I stop off at the pharmacy and pick up a protein bar and head for the front tills. By now my heart is pounding as I get closer to the till and the impulse rack by the till. As I get to the till I grab a coke zero out of the cooler and a Ferrero Rocher 3 pack off the impulse rack and go though the till. As I walk across the parking lot to the bus stop I pop open my coke zero and take a drink. I reach the bus stop bench and sit down. I pull out the Protein Bar and the Ferrero Rocher and I stare at them both weighing out which one I am going to eat. I put the Ferrero Rocher back into my gym bag and I open the protein bar. As I eat the protein bar a car with some teenagers goes by, they see me eating and roll down there window and make a derogatory statement towards me about my weight (I wish I could say this doesn’t happen very often, but it does most days) that is when I pop my ear buds in my ears and start my afternoon playlist on my Iphone. The bus ride to Alive is very awesome; as I sit on the bus I can feel the stress of the day peel off me. I start getting excited as it is Thursday, a training day with Damir. Thursday’s workout is like a last chance workout with Damir before I weigh in for the week. So I start think what is it going to be today! A crazy circuit outside with a giant tire, ropes and sled, or will it be the Hill of Hell or maybe a crazy circuit inside Alive with Kettle bells, Trx, and me pulling Ryan, Damir and Sam up the hallway. I get off the bus and head to Alive. As I cross the parking lot to alive I checkout the park across the street. I see no tire so I don’t think we are going outside.

As I open the door to Alive Sam says Hi Brian. I smile and see Damir sitting beside her. I say hi and open my bag and hand Damir the Ferrero Rocher. He smiles and opens them right away and pops one in his mouth. I tell him I am upset I even bought them. He says do not be so hard on yourself, yes you bought them, but you didn’t eat them. I get changed into my workout gear, Sam helps me put on my ankle brace. My Training Partner and best Friend Ryan arrives, fist bumping me on his way to the locker room. As Ryan gets changed I notice that Damir is bouncing off the walls! I know today is going to be intense.

We are staying inside, Damir explains the first Circuit. Stairs will be first for me, three sets up three flights. Next will be pushing Damir up the hallway and back. After that the lap pull down, and then it’s off to the medicine ball slam. Repeat.

So I start the up the stairs, up three flights and down. At the bottom I turn right around and head up right away and head back up. As I am starting my third set Damir check in with me and say let’s go, so I head back up the stairs, as I come down I came feel my heart pounding in my chest. As I reach the ground floor, Damir is waiting at the door. I stop to catch my breath, so Damir can put sliders under his feet, but he doesn’t. He just says Come on. He is facing me, as I put my hands on his shoulders; I begin to think this is going to be easy! I weigh at least twice as much as him. I start to push and he starts pushing back. It is every hard, he fights me for every inch like we are playing football. As we go down the hall I am thinking man he is one tuff son of a bitch. As we get to the end, I think I will get to catch my breath and I am wrong he immediately grabs me and we go back up the hall. I move over to the Lap pull down and start right away. My heart is pounding in my head and I can barely count as I pull down. I pound out the lap pull down, Damir see it was too easy and gives me a heavier weight for next time. I head over to the ball slam and start slamming it down, my heart is in the back and the front of my head and I lose count. I call it ten and pound though the next 20. As I finish the ball slam, Damir says I want us to get though this 3 more times. Take a small breather we will start again. By the time we get though the next 3 set, my legs feel like jelly, I have vomited in my mouth twice and my arms are just pulsing. As we finish I look over at Ryan and he has a pretty big sweat mark on his shirt. I look down and see mine is just as big. Damir say Cardio Brian. So I head over to the hamster wheel and start walking. Ryan joins me. We walk of another 30 minutes. We hop off and Ryan heads back down to the gym to stretch. I pull off my brace and head for the shower.

As we head to subway for dinner, Ryan and I talk a little, not much, because we are exhausted from our session with Damir. After dinner Ryan drops us off. I feed the cats, grab a coke zero and melt away in my chair to watch a little TV. Kristy begins to fall asleep, so I suggest we hit the hay. Kristy agrees and heads up the stairs. I sit a few minutes longer. To give her time to get into bed so I am not in her way. As I stand up my legs are so stiff. Exhausted I climb the stairs slowly. I plug in my Iphone in to charge for tomorrow and crawl in to bed next to Kristy and immediately fall asleep.

So this is an average Thursday in my life. I choose Thursday because it is the hardest day of the week for me. My work day is very busy and my workouts with Damir are insane.

Progress on my fitness goal this month is going well. I have done on of Ben’s Crazy Boot camp Saturday classes and plan to do this Saturday’s class as well. The hill of hell I have not yet been able to do as I have been rained out and smoked out as well. However on Friday I did Damir’s “Wheel of hell” program on hamster wheel for two hours, and he said that could count as doing the hill. Friday I hope to do the hill and I don’t think anyone is going with me yet. So if you want to join me let me know.

Hero I am not!!

2010-08-17T20:32:00.000-07:00

Hero I am not!

I know I have done well in the past year. I worked very hard on my weight loss journey. In last few weeks a few people have said that I am their hero, because of what I have done. I know this may sound weird to you but, this is the truth about how I feel when someone says that to me. I am no hero, a hero saves people from burning building, serves in the military, is a cop, or spends there life helping others. I am a just like everyone else who is on a weight loss journey, I struggle with food every single day; I never have a day where I don’t think about eating a chocolate bar or a bag of chips. I wish I could say I never eat that shit any more. But truth be told, I have caved more times than not, and eat that chocolate bar or enjoy a bag of potato chips. As I walk into work every day, I walk past the chocolate bar and potato chips, and say to myself please let me get out of here without buying this crap! Hero I am not!

Last night I came across my old “bucket list”, it was very sad. It only had places I wanted to eat, dishes I want to cook on it. Now that I have changed my life, it has changed big time. Here are my top 12 items

1. Play full contact football.

2. Bungee Jump or sky dive (this is what I want to do when I reach my goal)

3. Learn to drive

4. Play a pickup game of basketball

5. Photograph a beautiful nude woman

6. Ride a horse

7. Eat a Nathan's chilli cheese hot dog ( in new York, and Holly I know this is not in my food plan..in fact it may be all the calories for the day. LOL )

8. Learn to skate

9. Play softball

10. Run a 5k

11. Climb the steps of the Calgary tower

12. Take my shirt off on a hot day and look good

Although they may change in the future, this is what I am going to focus on now.

This month I have challenged myself to do the “hill of Hell” twice without Damir and to Do Ben’s awesome boot camp class twice as well. So far I have done Ben’s Class. It was awesome!! I am doing the hill on Friday and Ben’s Class again on the 28^th. If you would like to do Ben’s Class with me on the 28^th or the hill next week with me just send me a message.

one of his crazy “Satan little helper” moods

2010-08-05T21:37:00.000-07:00

One of his crazy “Satan little helper” moods

Today was an awesome day food and fitness wise. Somehow when I was going through the till at Wal-Mart on the way out I ended up with a bag of potato chips in my bag. I did not pick them up I think it was the person in front of me who had a whack of them on the belt in front of me, somehow I ended up with one not realizing it. While I was waiting for the bus I went into my shopping bag to get my Coke Zero and saw the chips. It was a long bus ride to Alive. My mind could not stop thinking about the chips in my shopping bag the whole bus ride. I was close to eating them. But I dug deep and did not eat them. Instead I told my trainer Damir to take them, and he did.

As I got off the bus I look at the time on my Iphone, 4:16, I turned on my music and walked up the block to Alive. I looked again as I opened the door to head in and it said 4:19. Wow it took only 3mins to walk from the bus. As I got my shorts and t-shirt on I smiled as I thought how far I have come. I know I have talked about it before, I just can’t wrap my head around that it took 15mins the first time I walked up that street to alive.

Tonight’s workout was in the park, across from alive, as my training partner Ryan and I walk across the parking lot we could see what Damir had planned for our hour. It looked insane!! There was a giant tire, weight sled, the rope, a sledge hammer and kettle bells. Although I did not notice the other stuff until I got to the park as my eyes did not really leave that giant tire. I could tell that Damir was in one of his crazy “Satan little helper” moods. As he began to tell us what we were going to do, all I was thinking was please don’t say were flipping that dam tire. He tells us to carry the 2 45lbs weights (one each hand ) to the tire and come back and put them on the weight sled, and I was thinking yes he didn’t say flip that dam tire, he continue to say pull the sled down around the tire and come back. Still I am yes he didn’t say flip the tire! He continues with 100 slams of the rope on each arm. I think 100 on each arm tough, but he didn’t say flip that tire. He continues... grab the sledge hammer and do 15 swings on each arm, and I am thinking yes he didn’t say flip the tire.. He continues run to the kettle bell and do 15 clean and press on each arm, and I am thinking ok looks like we are not going to flipping the dam tire. He continues after the kettle bell walk over to the ...... (And I am saying in my head not the tire not the tire) .....tire and flip it all the way up the park. He continued to say something else, but I did not hear what he said as I was staring at the tire. So Ryan starts, as I wait for him to get a little ahead of me I do burgees. As I am doing burpees I think I was staring at that dam tire the whole time. As he finishes with the weight sled Damir hands me the weights and I go I quickly go down and around the tire back to the sled and I put the weights on the sled and start pulling the sled down to the tire. It was allot harder then I thought it was going to be. I finish with the sled and go to the ropes, start slamming the ropes and it was not as hard as I thought. As I finish with the ropes I head over to the sledge hammer and start swinging, my heart is pounding so hard I can feel it in the back of my head. That is when I see Ryan flipping the tire and it looks hard. I finish with the sledge hammer which was harder then I thought, and I run to the kettle bells and start, now my heart is really pounding, I now can feel it in the back and front of my head now. My arms are hurting from the sledge hammer but I finish each arm with the kettle bell, and head over to the tire. As I look down at the tire I am overwhelmed by the size of the tire. I lift the tire up and flip it.....wow it was not as hard as I thought it was! In fact it is the easiest part of the workout so I pound the tire up the park and that is when he said don’t forget the push ups against the picnic table. After the push up I catch my breath and he say two more time let’s go! As we did circuit my heart jumped out of my chest more and more. The workout was like a last chance workout on the biggest loser. I would love to say I made it through the without losing my cookies, but now I did not I totally blew chucks, and since we were outside I didn’t swallow it just let loose just past the picnic table. After the workout my heart was so tired, I had to sit for about 20mins before starting my half hour of Cardio. It totally rocked tonight and I can’t wait until Tuesday’s hour with Damir.

The Plateau

2010-08-02T00:20:00.000-07:00

It has been such an intrusting month, vacation went very fast. During my time off from Wal-Mart I tried as much as I could to keep my calories on track. This was hard as temptation was everywhere, but I did keep in check. I took my niece to the stampede grounds, this was a tough as the smells were very overwhelming, everywhere you looked someone was eating crap, but I made it out of there only having 1 poor choice, lemonade. I won that battle. But while on vacation I did not eat in a good routine, and my body works well with routine. So I have been on a Plateau with my weight loss for over a month.

At first I thought maybe the plateau was the result of not being on a proper routine, but once I was back on routine nothing happen. So I talked to Damir about maybe cutting some of my calories? He suggested before I cut any that I should talk to Holly when she comes back from vacation. However maybe try eating some different foods like chicken or fish. So I Cooked off some chicken for last week’s lunches. Also we have been eating allot of Subway for dinner and Kristy noticed that the girl making my sub was putting double meat on my sandwich, because we have been going there allot lately I would just tell the girl the same as last time and I guess she thought I wanted double meat. So the last two weeks or so I have not been counting in the double meat calories. With the adding chicken into my routine and not having double meat on my sandwich, I broke my plateau!!

I don’t think it was just the change in my food that broke the plateau. We stepped it up with the workouts this week! This week the treadmill and I had really good dates. Monday I did 5 sets of the program that Damir put together for me. It rocked!! I was so wet from sweat it was like I fell in a pool or something. On Tuesday it was the “hill of hell”. Damir kicked my ass up that hill for an hour! Wednesday I did Damir’s kickboxing boot camp class and a little walk on the treadmill. Thursday I arrived at Alive with a bit of an attitude, I was in a bad mood.... this did not last long as Damir had me pull him up running.... not walking fast.... not jogging..... Running up the hallway! So the attitude went away very very fast. By the third or fourth set I was smiling. At the end of the session I asked if I could do one more set of pulling him up the hallway. He said ok ...... with that crazy grin.... that’s when I knew I was in trouble!! I pulled Damir and Ryan up the hallway.. When I got to the end of the hallway I just sat down .... That is when Damir said get up we are going back up the hallway..... Now my heart beat is pounding in my head...but I am trained well so when Damir says to do something I just do it without thinking ....so I start back up the hallway at first it was ok this not that bad, but then bang!! It got heavier ... but I kept going and got about 5 feet from the end and I stop. As I turned around I saw Ryan step off the sliders, then Damir and then another small surprise Sam was on sliders as well. It was not until I did the math in the car ride on the way home that I realized that I was pulling about as much weight as I weighed when I started. Friday I did the treadmill program at home ....was not as fun as doing it at Alive. Saturday I did the extended Kickboxing class and 30mins of the treadmill program. So all around it was a good week

Last month I did walk over 100 km This month’s Challenge is to do Ben’s Saturday Boot camp class twice and the “hill of Hell” twice if anyone out there would like to join me, please let me know.

Finding Brian

2010-07-06T21:55:00.000-07:00

Finding Brian

I have changed so much in the last year, so much, that I don’t really know who I am anymore. July 1^st was my friend Ryan’s birthday; at his party I had an eye opening experience. I had such a great time, during the party Damir asked me when the last time I played catch. Now I have not played catch in about 15 years. So Damir and I went down and played a little catch, well I don’t think it was a little catch, I am not sure how long we played but it was a long time. Not once but twice did not think I would enjoy it, but I was wrong. I loved it!! The first time I threw the ball I got very excited, because I really liked it. We must have been down there for an hour the first time and the second must have been about the same.

So this got me thinking if I like playing catch what else do I like. Should I try some of the foods I didn’t like in the in the past, because I might like it now. Like egg plant or liver maybe I like these things now. It is hard to say. I never like going on the treadmill, now I love it. The other night as a joke Ryan said “I don’t even know you anymore.” This is how I feel I have no idea who Brian is anymore. I think in order to find out who I really am I need to do some stuff out of my comfort zone, maybe I should try out yoga or rollerblading. I have never tried this stuff before and I may like it. There is so many things to try it is overwhelming.

So I think I should try something new each week. This week I stepped out of my comfort zone and I did Ben’s boot camp class on Saturday, I always thought that is was too hard for me to complete. Not only did I complete it, I enjoyed myself. It was so much fun. The music Rocked, and Ben was awesome. I think on my Saturday’s off I will add the boot camp to my routine.

My challenge since June 20 was to walk 100km by July 20 well I am at 58 km and there is still 15 days to finish it so I am on track.

that little devil inside my head

2010-06-29T21:18:00.000-07:00

The last month things have been up and down, sure I was have a few problems with the food thing. But I got that under control. I now have control of the food and I am no longer constantly thinking about bad food. I finally got to the point where I was feeling awesome. I forgot that I am always the biggest guy in the room. Then today on the bus I was listening to my music when I got a text and the music stopped. That is when I heard what the group of teenage girls at the back of the were talking about. They were mooing and making fun of my weight. So I turn my music back on and tried to forget about it. The bus trip felt like it was taking forever, and that is when that little devil inside my head showed up, I call him fat Brian, he started to talk and he never says anything good. So I start picking on myself, picking out all my flaws. I felt so fat. As I came to my stop, I was not in a very good place. I got off the bus grabbed my preworkout sub head to the park to eat it. Then off to the gym.

I started my workout, tonight’s workout was mostly on the treadmill, as I walked on the treadmill I start to think of all my accomplishments in the last year. The more I walked the better I felt about myself. Now after an hour of really pushing myself, I was feeling good but not there just yet. After an hour I hopped off the treadmill to clean it and Jen and Shaimaa came into the cardio room and said come on Brian get back on for another 30mins with us. Now I am soaking wet, from the amount of sweat. I roll my eyes, and got back on the treadmill, now they did not know what happen on the bus, nor did they know I was not feeling awesome yet. But that last 30mins did it. I started to feel awesome again. I powered through that last 30mins and I got off that treadmill feeling awesome. Funny how your friends jump in and help you with your head, even when they don’t have any idea you are not in a great place. This is why I love going to alive! The people there rock!!!

So yes if you see me getting off the treadmill and you say walk another 30mins with me, I will never say no. I may roll my eyes, but I will get back on and walk with you another 30mins! Thank you Jen and Shaimaa for pushing me tonight past my comfort zone!

Clean

2010-06-21T21:09:00.001-07:00

CLEAN

Funny how easy it is to fall back into old habits, I worked so hard to eat clean, workout and lose weight. The last 3 months has been so awesome, workouts rocked, the food was so clean, and I was in such a zone. Then one weekend of letting loose turn into two weeks of poor choices. Now I am trying to dig out of this set back, and all I can think about is stupid potato chips and ice cream. I made it through today without eating that crap, but boy that is all I can think about. I hate the term “will power” it pisses me off when people say that, I don’t think it was will power that I used for the last 3 months. It was dedication and fear that got me through the last three months. Tomorrow I will wake up and I hope that my mind starts to think of other things. Tonight I had a good talk with Damir, that help that he understood what I was going through.

What was really awesome about tonight was the fact that I think hell week is back. We did a crazy hour on the treadmill tonight. It was awesome, I was pushed way out of my comfort zone and maybe little past my limits. I love sessions like that!! It really helps put my mind back on what I was doing. Tomorrow I am on my own with the treadmill and I think I may try and see if I can push myself like Damir did today! I am going to eat clean tomorrow I just hope my mind can get on board and thinks clean! :o)

Wow!!

2010-06-18T21:26:00.000-07:00

Wow!!

Wow!! It has been an awesome couple of weeks. I hit my first year goal, I lost 100lbs!! I pulled it together and did it. Also I made a joke to my trainer Damir that I should try walking on the treadmill for three hours and walk more than 10km. He looked at me with that a giant grin on his on his face he gets just before I do something a chubby guy is not suppose to do. So on Friday June 4^th I walked on the treadmill for three hours. I had such an awesome support team my best friend Ryan walked with me for more than an hour and a half, then Jen took over and walked with me for over an hour, And in my last hour Leah and Sam jump on treadmills as well and I did it. I walked 3 hours it worked out to 14 km.

On Saturday June 5^th I had a fashion shoot with me in front of the camera. That was something else, I had been shopping the week before with Holly and Kristy and I have a whole new in the style.....no I mean I now have a style. During the shoot I had a moment that I have seen so many other people have, but until then it never happened to me. I did not recognise myself in the photo. I was truly stunned. I look so different, and I like what I was seeing. After the shoot Holly and Ben had a party to celebrate Kristy and I first big milestone. It was an awesome party!

On June 12^th I did a fundraiser that I do every year to raise money for the Wal-Mart Walk for Miracles I had a friend shrink wrap me to a bench at Wal-Mart and I sat there for 4 hours and raised $369. This time there was a lot of space left on that bench. Something great happen, many of the customers who donated last year notice that I was much smaller.

On June 13^th I did the Wal-Mart 5k walk for Miracles. I invited many of my friends from Alive to walk with me. 13 people showed up to walk with me, it was awesome. My team was bigger than the Wal-Mart 3010 store team (both volunteers and walkers). Now before the walk my team ask what my goal time was to finish the 5K, I said 1 hour and 15 mins. Well we blow that right out of the water. I finished in 1 hour and 2 mins. Damir pushed me the whole way; I mean literally he pushed me. It totally rocked!

I was feeling so good from the last couple of weeks, I started to slip a little with my food, ok slip is not the right word I fell off the clean wagon hard. In true addict style I started to talk myself into bad things. Started to think 1 burger.... i can handle it .... I can have 1 burger and it will end with just that.... yeah that didn’t work. 1 burger led to a lot more very poor choices. But my support team has quickly jumped in and gave me a good reality check and ass kicking. Now I am refocused and ready to take on the week. Thanks

New goal.....I will walk 100km in the next 4 weeks.... So by July 20 I will reach this first small goal of 100 km!

It just has not sunk it yet!

2010-06-02T21:25:00.000-07:00

It just has not sunk it yet!

Wow it has been a whole year now since I started my weight loss journey. Last night looked at some old pictures of me, and I did not realize how big I was. It is something to say I lost 99 lbs, but wow looking at those photos what a difference. What is really awesome is how much I have changed on the inside. In those photos I could see how unhappy I was. I was not living life. Now I am almost always smiling and very positive.

Last weekend I finished a 5k walk, unlike the 5k walks I have done in the past. This one was timed with a sensor on my shoe laces. It was fun to walk with some friends and finish 23 minutes faster than last one I did in November. This time after the walk my legs did not hurt as bad as the last time. It is great to know that I can finish a 5k without having to spend the rest of my day sleeping. After the 5k I went shopping with Holly and Kristy for some new clothes. That was such a fun time, Holly and Kristy pulled all kinds of different stuff for me to try on. When I tried on the first outfit they put together for me, I looked in the mirror & I took a double take, if fact I think I looked behind me to see if it really was me. Now I have seen a few of my friends at alive not realize how far they have come, never did I think I would ever think that way. We were there for an hour or so, & when we left I was so happy. Now that was very weird for me, because in the past when I would go shopping for clothes, I would leave very upset. Not this time it was awesome I have ever felt so confident before. I can’t wait to show off my new look this weekend.

Tonight when I stepped on the scale and Kristy started screaming and Damir had a giant smile on his face because I have now hit 99lbs down. I didn’t react....in fact it still has not hit me yet. Maybe it is because I have not lost 100 lbs yet, not sure, but I am sure when it does I will lose it, and there will be lots of tears. Yet don’t get me wrong I am very proud of what I have done so far! It just has not sunk it yet.

11 days and 11 pounds

2010-05-24T21:19:00.000-07:00

11 days and 11 pounds

I am so close to 100 lbs down. I have 11 days until my healthy lifestyle birthday; I would like to be 100 lbs down. It is going to be down to the wire. This all started with Holly and Damir challenging me to meet that goal. There were three big rules to start with. 1) Keep my calories and fat to what Holly set it to by eating clean as I can. 2) Cardio, Cardio, and more Cardio after every session or class. 3) No burgers, No deep fried items, No Chips. Yes those rule are all no brainers, however I have am a food addict so I thought it would be hard to follow. But I was wrong it was very easy to follow & not only was it easy but I am really loving eating clean and don’t tell Damir I am starting to love the hamster wheel. Who knew, besides Holly?

Almost a year ago I walked into Alive looking at the ground not very happy at all. I went there because my loving wife told me she was not going to watch me killing myself slowly anymore. “Killing myself slowly” I hated when people would say that to me, probably because it was true and I did not want to hear it. I walked in there thinking to myself “well this is not going to work, I am 520lbs, and it just took me 15 minutes to get here from bus. I can’t do this every day”. After a few weeks I slowly started to get better, it would only take 7 or 8 minutes to get to Alive from the bus, Holly had me drinking so much water I was peeing 10 to 15 times a day, and I was thinking “ok maybe this will work, but I doubt it. Also Hope I can make it from Wal-mart to Alive without having to pee” A month or so went by, and it was taking 4 minutes or less to get to Alive from the bus, Holly had me eating so much Veggies and Tuna I was worried I was growing gills, and I was thinking “I want this to work, I really want this to work For me.” October came along and I could see that I could do the working out, but the food just was not there yet. Christmas arrived and I made it through the holidays without gaining weight, however adding Sweets and junk food even just for a few days back into my life was not a good idea. This made me very cocky and I was eating through my calories and Kristy’s calories in a day. This went on for awhile and it was hard to kick the habit again. But I did it. February arrived and I was sticking to my lifestyle change every day except on Friday night. After I would weigh in we would go out for burgers, we would hit Tommy Burger, and it was very tasty. But again my weight loss stalled. In a session with Holly she looked at my food log and asked me where we went for our burgers on Friday nights. After some research on the internet Holly found out that My Friday night burger was 50g of fat. Opps that was not a good choice.

Then April arrived and my clean eating habits were finally there and that is when I was challenged. I am glad that they did that because now I know that it may be a long road to reach my biggest goal, but I know I can do it! I am so happy!! 89 pounds down and I feel so great. Make by the 4^th of June or not this train will keep going until I and at a happy weight.

Hot Tub Time Machine

2010-05-18T21:43:00.000-07:00

If I had a hot tub time machine I would go back to 1990. Not to invent Google or the Iphone, no I would love to show the 17 year old Brian what life has become for 36 year old Brian. I would track him down, now the 17 year old Brian would be easy to find. Just need to walk in to the closest Fast Food place or Moxies at Chinook. Now he would not believe me, but I have a secret weapon, a secret only we know. Sorry guys got to keep that to myself in case I do stumble into a hot tub time machine.

After he understood that I was him, a very large version of him we would have to go for a little walk, now you sitting him down and talking to him is not going to work. So since I found young Brian at the Moxies at the Chinook mall I thought we should start with a little walk down a busy mall. Now if you have experienced this with me you know what is about to happen. We would start walking and first we would hit the 3 or 4 year olds who would say “Mommy he is so fat”. Now this would not really make an impact on younger Brian. No he will think that it is ok they are so young they don’t know any better. Next we would walk by a store I used to love to shop at, and we would stop in to see if they have anything in my size, and they don’t have anything. While in the store some Teenagers are there and they start mooing, this makes younger Brian uncomfortable and a little angry. So we leave the store. Now we head to the up to the food fair to grab younger Brian favourite, Fries and Mayo, as we share the very bad snack a 20 something woman say under her breath “ salad would be better bubby!” now younger Brian asks “how do you make it though the day, I could not be that strong.” I would answer “Dude this is not strength, this is sadness, sadness that it has come to this. Now you can go on the path you are on & end up going through this every single day, or you we can go for a different walk and I can point you toward some help.”

Now pointing younger Brian in the right direction is a little hard. It is 1990 and Damir is 3 years old, so that won’t work. So I would take him to the southland leisure center and show him a class schedule, and suggest a few classes to start. Then I would take him to a Taekwondo Studio and tell him trust me you will love this. Then I would pull out the old bike and say ride this as much as you can. Last I would take him to Weight Watchers and say “now you are 200 pounds, they will help you learn how to eat and drop 30 pounds or so and help you maintain a healthy body weight. Now I am not going to lie to you there will be Blood, Sweat and many tears, however if you take care of this now you will beat this and life will be a whole lot better. When you are 35 or so look up Alive Personal Training you will love it there! Also in a couple of years you are going to meet Jennifer Steeves, trust me, Run the other way, Don’t walk run!! ”

Now Back to reality I am very close to a 100 pounds down, I can see that big milestone and can feel that a healthy weight can be achieved, but boy I wish I could go back and kick that Chubby 17 year olds ass. My workouts this week look like there going to be on the Hamster wheel with Damir...this will be a crazy amount of, the taste of blood, lots and lots of Sweat and a few Tears, however last time we did just the treadmill I lost 15 or so pounds in just a few weeks. So this is going to Rock!!! Painful but it is still going to rock !!

Six Little Words!

2010-05-07T23:33:00.001-07:00

Six Little Words

What a week, I have been working hard on my weight loss program. Not a day passed this week where my legs weren’t in pain. My heart say’s push through, pain is my friend, you can do it, dig deep! My legs say’s with every step, stop, stop, stop, ouch, ouch, ouch, hello pain means stop dummy!! My head say’s walking on the hamster wheel means you will lose... got to burn off the food you ate earlier, get your head in the game...Let’s go. Since it was two against one I push hard!! So hard that During Thursday night’s stroll on the Hamster wheel my legs Charlie horsed. So after 30 minutes of the worst pain I have felt on the hamster wheel, I got off. Then in the shower the Charlie horse came back. It was a rough night.

Friday’s workout rocked, my legs were sore however after the first ten minutes the soreness went away, and I just sweated my ass off! Damir pushed and pushed and pushed! That hour flew by. Then it was time for my weekly weigh in. Now I only weigh once a week, every Friday at 5 minutes to 6pm. I jumped on the scale excited to see how my body did this week. I did my part; I was on the ball with the food. I slipped up only once this week with the food. Walked 23 km on the hamster wheel, and had some of the best workout I have ever had. So I did my part, Damir did his, but did my body do its job. Nope! I stood on that scale and it stop Bam 438.... Same as last week! That is when it happened Damir said something I never thought he would say “No Gain, No Loss, Good Job” at first I was not sure that what he said “no pounds up on your low week is good before you would go up ... I am happy with no gain” not sure he said it exactly like that but that was the just of it.

Now in the past... if I had no loss I would have pulled Iphone and I would go over my food log and exercise log and try and figure out where I went wrong. Then while in the shower beat myself up over everything I did wrong. But this time I did not need to go over my logs, because I knew I had done everything that I could do to lose weight. My body just needed more time I guess. So I enjoyed my shower like I had lost weight and I did not panic and call Holly, I just texted her “No Gain, No Loss, But next week will rock” and I left Alive with a smile.

I still have 18 pounds to lose before I hit my First year’s goal. I have 4 weeks to do it in. Next week I am going to try and step it up a bit. I plan to walk 35km on the Hamster wheel next week. I know Damir plans to step it up next week as well. To that I say Bring it on!

It feels great to know I have worked my ass off this week, and for the first time I can say to myself those 6 little words “No Gain, No Loss, Good Job” Because that is still a pretty good battle I have just won!!

So I am going to continue, like the great line from my theme song as of late

“No chain no lock and this train won't stop!
We got No fear No doubt all in balls out” - Burn It to The Ground

30 Days

2010-05-04T22:13:00.000-07:00

30 Days

I have been on this weight loss road for 11 months. On my journey I have met some amazing people. They have become a Team Brian. Supporting me with the tuff stuff, there are the pros, Family, and friends.

The Pro’s

On my team we must start with Damir, wow what you say about one of the people saving your life. Well to start from the beginning he did not see a 500 pound man. He just kicked my ass from the start. He seems to think I can do almost anything, sometimes it works out and we rock it, then there are other times when I am just not ready to do it, and when that happens he is very patient try’s to modified it to work or we move on it in a positive way. However when I do something, I could not do before he is more excited than me sometimes. Also on my pro team is Holly, also one of the people saving my life. She has put together a very easy food plan that even I can stick to. Also like Jillian from the biggest loser she takes care of all the head shit I have. But unlike Jillian she rocks it without raising her voice. Also she pulls me in when I fall off course. Also on my team is Kendra, who kicks my ass once a week in her Kickboxing Class, she push me with the cardio beyond my limits with crazy interval workouts and is always smiling. We can’t forget Ben, or as I call him “the Kristy whisper” he is very motivating. Always in a good mood, and always makes me feel great about myself.

The Family

My family has been for the most part great support. My super Wife is very awesome; she supports me in many different ways. First she keeps my diet on track. She listens to me vent when I have a bad day. She also pushes me to Alive on the very few times I don’t feel or want to go. She does so much more! She just rocks! Mom and Dad help by giving me encouragement when I need it most. Maggie is the inspiration to keep moving.

Friends

I have met many great people at Alive, Jen who also gives me a lot of encouragement, and pushes me to get on the hamster wheel when I don’t want to. Kim and Shaimaa, who are great to talk to and makes me feel like a rock star. Leah who likes to push me past the limits I have chosen on the hamster wheel and the Stairs. Many Many more who have helped me at alive. Ryan who is my training Partner and my Best Friend who keeps pushing me to go harder. There are many many more !! thanks everyone.

I have 30 days left until my Alive Birthday, 18 pounds to go to break 100lbs! I can see it happening, I have become so strong and confident in the last year it is amazing!

Why I do What I do

2010-04-23T23:52:00.000-07:00

Why I do What I do

Before I became Alive at Alive, I was a going through the motions. Not really living! I would not make plans for the future, because I felt I did not have one. I would not react when someone would put me down, give me a dirty look, or come right out and calls me names. I would let it slide off me like I was made of Teflon. When Maggie (my sweet little niece) was 4 I took her to Chuck e Cheese on a Saturday, if you have never been there on a Saturday it is like standing it the toy department of a Wal-Mart on the Saturday before Christmas. She was playing having a good time when she asks me a question “Uncle Brian why is that woman staring at you? She does not look happy, is she staring at you because you are cubby?” I did not know what to say, so I went with the truth and said “yes, I don’t think she has a friend like Uncle Brian. She turned to me and hugged me and said that is not very nice. This was the first time I want to change my life & I did not know how. As I told I many times before just let it go.

A few months later Kristy and I took her to see Kung Fu Panda, We choose the movie because there was a scene in the Trailers where Po (the Panda) is climbing the stairs gets to the top and sits down for a break because he is out of breath and tired. The first time she saw it she pointed at the panda and Said “he’s like Uncle Brian” I thought that was cute did not think anything about it. We saw the movie and in the middle there is a scene where The kung fu Master asks Po why he does not quit, Po say because all the pain the master panda put him through, does not compare to the pain he goes through out in village everyday where the others make fun of him. Maggie leaned into me grabbing my head and pulling it close to her and asked me “do you feel that way Uncle Brian, because you are chubby too”

In the last two weeks Damir and I have pushed my body past it limits, well it feels that way. I have a goal that I want to reach in my first year. so we have turned it up a bit. Some Mornings it has been a bit of a chore to get moving. Yes there has been pain! My legs were very sore and stiff. A co worker suggested I slow it down and take a break; you don’t have push that hard. Yes I do, Not because if my first year goal, no, I need to because I don’t want to ever feel the way I felt when Maggie asked Why the woman was staring at me. Also Just like in the movie Kung fu Panda, The pain in my legs is nothing compared to the pain I feel when the small minded people in the world try and make me feel bad about my size. Also I would love for Maggie to not see me as a Chubby Guy. I don’t think Maggie see’s me as the Chubby Guy, but I do. I can’t wait until we can walk down the mall and I am not freaked that there might be a small mind person around who is going to put me down in front of Maggie. So I must keep this train on its track and stop for nothing.

So please when you see me on the hamster wheel, give me a smile because now you know why I go to alive everyday and walk on that hamster wheel.

rules to surviving personal training

2010-03-17T21:34:00.000-07:00

Rule #1 Cardio

Rule #2 Vomiting can only happen in the locker room bathroom or learn to swallow

Rule # 3 Never ever say “I can’t do that”

Those 4 little words turn your trainer into the Drill Sgt. from full metal jacket. Nobody wants that!

Rule # 4 Crying is for the shower or the ride home

Rule # 5 do not confess your bad habits

Rule # 6 enjoy your victories

Both Scale and non scale victories. You just kicked some ass Enjoy!

Rule # 7 Smile when your body makes those special noises!

Farting and burping is going to happen, get comfortable doing this in front of your trainer, because it is going to happen.

Rule # 8 calling the person saving your life an asshole is ok

Sometimes you will feel like calling your trainer names like “asshole or Satan’s little helper” it is ok because they have heard it all. In my experience he likes it and gets off on it!

Rule # 9 wear something to keep the sweat out of your eyes

Rule # 10 when saying “I need a good ass kicking or bring it on” make sure Walking is optional the next day!

“I think it is true you have to go through hell to get to heaven”

2010-03-04T21:27:00.000-08:00

I have been a fixture at alive for months and months, I go there 5 to 6 days a week. It is fun to go there, well most weeks. As you can see from my earlier posts I can do the exercise, however the food is my Green Kryptonite.

Now when I say food I mean all the bad stuff, chips, Ice cream, burgers, etc...So somewhere along the way I started to forget that I need to follow my food plan. So I have not been holding up my end. So I think to teach me there are consequences if I don’t hold up my end, and that it is not muscle that I am gaining. Damir has banished me to the treadmill. That is where” it is fun most weeks to go to alive, because this week has not been fun.” Now I know what you are thinking, the treadmill is easy you just walk on it, how hard can that be? Now I have walk on the treadmill many time before, but on Monday I learned that speed is not everything and I thought it would be like in the biggest loser where Damir would just keep turning up the speed, Wrong on Monday he said “we are not going to turn up the speed don’t worry that” so I am doing my 5 min warm up & thinking ok this is going to be easy. Then around 3 min in it hits me in the past like a ton of bricks when Damir has me sit down in the gym it becomes very very very hard real fast. So I then the panic sets in. I hit 5 min and he starts turning up the grade, not a little no he puts at the top 15! So my little walk on the treadmill turns into a very hardcore workout! Up...down....up...down...up...down! So 30 min fly’s right by and our session is done. He turns to me and says “don’t get off until you hit 65 min no holding on and no jumping off to rest I will be watching.” So I am thinking that was a 30min session, what will we do for our hour tomorrow, we won’t do the treadmill for an hour. Wrong!! It will be this hell all week. Tomorrow we weigh in, and I have been on the ball with the food and been on the treadmill everyday for at least an hour. I should finally break 450! I think it is true you have to go through hell to get to heaven and right now 448 would be heaven!

This journey

2010-02-10T20:27:00.000-08:00

This journey has changed many things in my life. The way I look at food as fuel, not as a way to make me feel better. The way I see how my body is different every week. It is funny how my body changes, one week my nipples are in one place the next week it is like they moved up or down by inches. Not only is my journey changed my life, I have found new things that I love that I never thought I would. The way new runners feel on my feet. The way a fresh t-shirt smells at the beginning of your workout. The excitement I feel when I am about to start an hour workout with Damir or kickboxing class with Kendra. The rush I feel when I did something that I thought I could not do. The feeling of running never thought I would be running! This Journey has also brought many great people into my life. Everyone is great encouraging me, sometimes they don’t even know they are. I feel very blessed. Thanks Everyone

“Food is going to always be the hard part”

2010-01-26T12:21:00.000-08:00

“Food is going to always be the hard part”

It has been seven months I have been on this weight loss journey; you would think that I would have the food thing down. I thought I did, then Christmas came along and I fell off the wagon. I am a food addict, so adding some sweets and chip into my diet was not a good idea. So, after Christmas I got cocky and thought I could still eat that shit and lose weight, wrong! As an addict I can talk myself into eating a bag of chips very quickly. I have great support from my wife, I don’t think she has an addiction like I do, she can say no easily. This journey is a long one; it takes long to put it on longer, to take it off. Exercise is the fun part of this. So last night when I was bitching on the way home to my Friend Ben, he said “Brian the Food is going to always be the hard part” It was nice to hear I was not insane. So I am proud to say I have made it 24 hours now without any chips, cookie or Ice cream and here is hoping that I go the next 24.

Lost

2010-01-20T20:37:00.000-08:00

Lost

It has been a very different week then what I normally have, LOST is the best way to describe what I am going through this week. I don’t know what happened, but I seem to have lost my way. Thursday night I had a nightmare that Big Brian was back, and he was bigger than ever. On Friday I had to weigh in with Damir and I was up some weight. I thought I was doing well with the food, but I am not sure. So now I am very lost. Also yesterday I had the first feeling like “man I don’t feel like going into the gym tonight” I was told it would happen, but I never believed that it would. So after punching out at work I grabbed my phone and went to call my friend and life coach to kick my ass to get in Alive. I started to dial, but I stopped & took a deep breath said to myself “Just go, you are better than this.” Yes I went!

The good thing is that Damir is really kicking my ass this week. Time to dig deep and find my way back.

What will it be like!

2010-01-13T21:05:00.000-08:00

This week I have been dreaming again, I have been wondering what it it will be like to walk into a Wal-Mart and buy 6 pairs of underwear, two shirts, and a pair of jeans and only spend 40 bucks. Right now that would not even buy me a pair of jeans. I wonder what it will be like to be able to go out with my friends to a restaurant and not have to tell the hostess where I need to sit so I can fit. I wonder what it will be like to have woman get giggly and giddy around me like they do around Ben and Damir.

It is very exciting to think of the future, last night on the biggest loser Bob put on the amount of weight (in weight vests and belts) that I started my weight loss journey with. 520 lbs, He moaned about how much weight they put on him. Could not believe how much his body hurt. I thought wow this he really is seeing what life was like, is like right now. Then he really pissed me off he turned to the contestant h and said “I don’t know how you go through life like this, I get to take this off in a minute. Do know how long it will take me to get that off you? Months!” Months try it will take me years Asshole, however I hope it only takes him months. But if he does lose the weight that fast I don’t think it will stay off. So I will never stop, fitness is here to stay in my life! I love it! I love it more then I love coke zero, my friends will probably fall out of seats when read this, because they know how much I love coke zero. So I know my future is going to be great. I will buy clothes at Wal-Mart one day, and I will sit anywhere in a restaurant. It is going to Rock!! I can’t wait!!!

What will it be like

2010-01-12T12:25:00.000-08:00

Getting back on track

2010-01-03T19:41:00.000-08:00

Getting back on track

So Christmas and New Years is all done, it is time to reel things back in. Yes the holidays were great; I wish I could say I made it through the holidays without gaining any weight, but I did gain a little. However I did make it through the holidays without guilt or beating myself up over what I put in my body. Now with the New Year comes a new outlook on my weight loss Journey. I started the year off right, working-out with a friend on New Year’s Day. In January I plan to eat very clean, my new range arrives this week so on Sundays I will be menu planning, shopping, and cooking for the week. I plan to eat like I did during the nutrition boot camp three weeks of the month. My goals for the month of January lose 6 to 8 pounds, drink 8 to 10 glass of water every day, Finish the book I got for Christmas about healthy eating, and walk on the treadmill 4 times a week for at least of 30mins.

Boy, this Christmas thing SUCKS!

2009-12-21T12:03:00.000-08:00

Boy, this Christmas thing SUCKS!

Sometimes it is easy to get though the day controlling my Food Addiction, but this Christmas thing is much harder than I thought. Back in November I made a commitment to not gain any weight over the holidays. Well now I know that is not something I can do. I forgot something very important, my brain is different than most peoples, and some can only have one cookie and stop when they had just a little treat. Mine does not work that way, cookie leads to two, and then I start thinking well if I had two, two more won’t hurt. Later when I am alone I think well I have already had Cookies so why not have a few chips. So I eat a small bag of chips......then a large bag and then Ice cream twice!...... I totally lost control. I don’t understand why my brain works this way, I know what I am eating is wrong (when I am doing it) yet I just can stop. So now the weekend is over and I am going to step back on that scale tomorrow & I know from what I ate there will be a gain. Now Christmas has not even happened yet and I have already can feel there will be a gain.

So here is my Plan for This Week.

· No guilt, I am human ....most likely there will be some mistakes.

· I will be accountable.....if I eat it I will log it.

· Days that I am not at Alive I will walk on the treadmill at home for at least 30mins

· I will be honest with myself and my support ( Damir, Holly and Kristy)

· I will not eat because I am upset or board

· I will have fun with Family & friends

· Last I am going to eat birthday cake on my birthday

I can do this!

OH you are so busted!

2009-12-17T12:09:00.000-08:00

The other day I was running behind to get to my training session, while waiting out front of Wal-Mart I had a few handfuls of Munchies. Thinking a few would not be all that bad I am sure I will work it off by the end of my session. So I arrived late to my session and hurried into alive. Of course my Trainer Damir was standing up front by desk waiting for me. As I can in he said “slow down we will just do a half hour instead of an hour.” So I unzipped my jacket and a Cheesy fell to the ground, I Pretended it did not happen and hung up my jacket. That’s when it happen Damir looked at me and said “Why the hell is there a Cheesy falling out of your jacket! That is not what you are supposed to be eating” “oh you are so busted!” Said Sam from behind the desk. Now I know that some would say Damir would let that go, but my workouts this week seem Very Very intense. Now that could be because the Holliday’s are coming, but I think it is that dam Cheesy haunting me.

How I started on my Journey

2009-12-13T19:59:00.000-08:00

Every Tuesday I would tune in to watch the Biggest Loser, Say to myself these people are the luckiest people in the world. They have won the lottery, there going to the ranch/campus to begin a new like. Then It happen at the beginning of the last season,

Jillian & Bob started the show with an ass kicking for there viewers, Instilling you can do this at home! Urging us to put down that ice-cream we were eating as we watched the contestants loss weight! The Dimmer Switch in my head began to turn, not very far but it started to turn. Every week I would watch, them lose the weight, crying at the end of each show. Not because they did well nope, I was a very jealous of the fact they are getting a second chance. In the season finale last year Jerry the guy who went home first won the at home contest. So my awesome wife said enough we can do this, lets get a trainer and see what happens.

Now we have done every diet out there, so at first I was not very confident this was going work. I bought a membership to a gym in the past, went once, felt very uncomfortable and I then I would quit. Again my Awesome Wife talked to a few people & my brother in-law suggested trying out where he went and use his trainer. A little personal training Studio called Alive. I began on June 3 weighting 520 pounds, 6 months later I have lost 65 pounds & it has been the best 65 pounds I ever lost, because I know that it is gone for good as I worked very hard to lose those 65 pounds. I feel the Dimmer switch in my head has now turned a lot. I used to think exercising is the hardest part of weight loss, I was wrong that is the easy part. The hard part is eating and the food. There is more to it then just eating a lot of veggies!

It is very sad to think that I wasted all those years, thinking it can’t be done. Now I know it can be, the biggest loser may have got me to start my Journey, but it is the hard work of My Trainer, My Life Coach, My Wife and I that will help me reach my goal.